(All The Photos in This Post Was Taken When I Was 16)
Dear 16 years old self,
Hey Sydney Audry! 16 aye? You are not a normal 16 year old because I know that you're hella confused and hella depressed right now. You're thinking about ending your own life every single day. You've fallen from grace. You've stepped away from religion. You've turned your back from your biblical roots. You've become the prodigal child you've always avoided to be. You are in a heap of mess. You've fallen into a deep pit of misery. You've been damned into thinking that every guy that you'll meet will never truly love you, and will eventually leave you hanging and break your heart, after that boii that you oh so loved dearly cheated on you. Not just boy problems at this age but bully problems as well. You were stabbed in the back with words that bleed because you've stood up alone for what's right, and that's okay. I'm proud of you. School is like hell on Earth for you. It's a prison. You've endured 4 hellish years in Highschool just because you straightened something that was crooked in every single way. Being bullied for 4 years for doing what is right is better than shutting your mouth and tolerate injustice. Your trust will be broken by the people that you trust and love the most. People will come and go in your life and that's okay. The ones that will truly stay are the ones that were only meant to stay in your life, the ones that left were just meant to pass by your life and to serve as a lesson. You've been scarred and traumatized, but a year after, you'll learn how to put wings to your pain and reside them on a paper. You're a strong and opinionated woman, just like your favorite Disney princess, "Merida". Just like Merida, you are Brave. You'll go through fire. You'll drown with your very own tears. And that's okay, you will be okay. Diamonds go through fire before they shine. And so you will.
One thing I can assure you of is, life gets harder but when it gets harder, it gets better. God will walk with you through it all, HE will never leave you nor forsake you. If God has called you to it, He'll walk you through it. God has a habit of picking "nobodies'' and making them into a somebody without consulting anybody. You're in good hands cause you're in God's hands. You're going to be someone whom God has purposely made you to be and whom he has called you to be. Just listen and obey to His word and authority, swallow your pride. You'll be okay. Stop purging, you're already shedding a lot of weight. You'll surely have anemia just because of bulimia. Believe it when people say that "You're Beautiful & Sexy" cause it's true. Love yourself as much as you love the people around you. You'll be okay, things will get better. Turn back to Christ. I'm proud of you, even though you'll always be a cry baby. Spoiler alert, you'll get a Daschund and you'll name it after Isaac Newton.
One last thing, you don't have to change a thing, the world can change it's heart. Never change yourself to be someone that you're not to please the society. You'll be fine, just stay strong.
~ 18 year-old self. xoxo.
Here's a DAB to wrap up the post. I remember posting this photo and the caption was " Sad but RAD.😎 "
All of the photos in this post were taken when I was 16.
@churchgaldiaries, signing out. xoxo.