LIFE BEFORE AND AFTER FORMALIZING MARRIAGE

Yesterday I had the privilege of attending a seminar handled by my national coordinator in the person of Dr. Mfon Ineme and it was indeed a rewarding moment. Below are the taking points from the lecture.


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If you fail in marriage, you have failed in life but if you succeed in marriage then you have invariably succeeded in life. If you have a good marriage, you have finished but if you have a bad marriage, you are finished. Marriage was originally instituted by God to be a sweet and beautiful experience but nowadays, the reverse is the case. We happen to see a lot of people who want out of their marriages and there are many regretting their marriage.

So, if you are yet to marry and you don't want a situation where you would be regretting your marriage, pay attention to the following.

There are four phases in marriage and there are

  • The Preparatory Phase
  • The On Your Mark Phase
  • The Get Set Phase
  • The Running Phase

THE PREPARATORY PHASE OF MARRIAGE

This is the phase of absolute singleness. It is a very important phase before marriage. These are some of the things one should be doing in this phase:

  • pray for your marriage
  • have a personal and cordial relationship with the initiator of marriage.
  • learn to manage and control your emotions.
  • determine to be the best spouse. Don't look for the best spouse.
  • Remain single while you are single.
  • be serious with God's business. Don't wait to be followed up.
  • learn to cut your cloth according to your clot not your size. Don't stretch beyond your resources.
  • control your appetite
  • identify and deal with negative trends
  • Don't plan to go.

THE ON YOUR MARK PHASE

  • Have a personal need for a spouse. Don't marry because the society wants you to. Don't marry for anybody but yourself.
  • Go to someone from God's family
  • Understand that you are not desperate or frustrated. Look good always. Because you are not married today doesn't mean you won't marry tomorrow.
  • Don't marry as though you are doing someone a favour.
  • Enquire about the person you want to marry.
  • Be specific about your intentions.
  • Be sincere from the onset. Don't pretend about anything. Say things the way there are.

THE GET SET PHASE

  • Understand that this person is not yet your spouse. Matthew 1:18-19
  • Understand that the relationship might not end up in marriage. So give what you can let go.
  • Accept and go for someone you can respect.
  • Complain about the things you don't like.
  • Give things you're ready to miss.
  • Your wedding must not be the best in town. Marriage does not attend weddings.

THE RUNNING PHASE

This phase is the actual marriage phase. Noth the following :

  • Don't disgrace your spouse in public.

  • Be available for ypur spouse

  • learn to say I'm Sorry

  • learn to express love.

  • call your wife a sweet pet name.

  • Never beat your spouse

  • learn to do everything together.

  • Remember to care for your spouses parents and relatives.


Stay blessed!!!
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