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My restless legs paced the room, measuring the distance in the small space. I could not say it was a surprise. That would be a lie. I don't have a problem with lying. But when the person you want to lie to already knows the truth, what do you do?
There I stood or walked or just shifted my body. It was one of those times when words said too much and silence never said enough. There were so many thoughts in the room. I could feel them taking up the space in the room. It was suffocating.
She looked at me with those big blue eyes that always bore into my soul. I lie a lot. But I've never been able to lie whenever she looks at me like that. I thought of something to say. I was supposed to say something right?
I wanted to say it was the devil's work. Like it was something beyond my control. I stopped myself before the words could escape my mouth. I'm an atheist. That wasn't going to hold.
I then considered blaming it on the girl. The girl that seduced me. If you actually consider it, the girl seduced me. Not directly though. I mean, was I supposed to see a babe with a huge behind walk past and do nothing? Okay, I was supposed to do nothing.
I thought of telling her it was a mistake. After all, it had worked before. It probably would have worked again if I hadn't overused it. It was the sixth time she caught me in the act. Was I striving for perfection?
Anyway, I can't let her go. She's too good at everything. She cooks well, sings well, works well, earns well, even fucks well. So I turned to her, with real tears rolling down my cheek and asked for one last chance.
She replied 'Last chance is a bar in the United States. Goodnight!"