Have you ever heard of the double slit experiment? To me it always seems like whatever your perception is of a place, that's what you find. People try to explain this with a number of different phenomena such as the law of attraction or observation bias but it's interesting to consider. Theres all sorts of people in all groups so it often comes down to who you surround yourself and the tone you respond to people with. Sometimes a group of people on edge can be a slippery slope when all that anxiety leads to a powderkeg and simple standoffishness can lead to feuds and animosity when some clarity could have eased tensions and lead to friendships and partnerships. There's a lot of different psychological factors at play.