Rudeness. This word has been on my mind today because of something that happened this morning. I arrived at my usual place at Starbucks which is where I hang out and complete whatever classwork I have. I’ve been a regular for about 6 months now, so it’s safe to say that I like the atmosphere and people.
Quick backstory… I have been an amputee since February. It was an elective amputation to remove a leg that had been essentially useless for 16 years because of a car accident when I was young.
Back to the present… I parked my car, grabbed my crutches, and walked on into the building and found an empty table. I put down my bag and got in line to order a drink. There were two young adult gals behind me (probably 18-20 years old), and began whispering about what I like to call Stumpy. I heard them, as they were not as quiet as they thought they were, but did not pay much attention because I was used to the stares. I moved along with the line, and the gals began questioning each other about my ability to take care of myself, my mental capabilities, why I was alone… and the questions continued.
I wondered why the line was taking so long while trying to block out the conversation behind me. Their questions were getting a bit personal, but I’ve heard the questions before. Then it turned from questions to mockery as the gals began to laugh about their own presumptions of what my life must have been like and how I probably had to be taken care of, even though I was standing there alone and quite able to maneuver on my own.
I struggled with whether I wanted to smack them or if I wanted to ignore them. I am not a physically aggressive person, and a bit of a flighter instead of fighter. But, I am human and therefore have human emotions. The thought that got to me the most was that if they did this to me then how many others have they done it to, and how many people have they hurt as a result?
So, I placed my order, and turned around to face them. They tried to avoid eye contact with me, knowing that they were caught. “You choose who you become, whether you are kind or not,” I said. And, while I was a bit irritated with them, I chose in that moment to live what I said, and I paid for their drinks. I did not say another word as I walked away. The gals never came back to me, nor did I look around for them.
This experience is something that many of us who have unique circumstances go through. People say that kids are mean, but adults can be just as cruel. I could have gone off on them, but that would have accomplished nothing. I hope that they learned something, but it is up to them whether or not they did.
Never be afraid to speak up for yourself, but always remember that you choose who you become. Rudeness, in my opinion, serves little purpose.
Do you have any moments like this? If so, how did it affect you?
Thanks for stopping by! -Shana