Love is a beautiful thing, and basically, everyone wants to love and be loved. We all, as humans, crave to be cherished and appreciated by others, and it's a beautiful aspect of our lives that gives us some remarkable and mind-blowing memories to look back on. Although not all love stories end well or the way we wanted, some crumble along the way due to some misunderstanding or difference, and today I'd love to share my take on this and love languages.
Many things keep a relationship going, such as love, trust, understanding, communication, attention, commitment to one another, and the like, but while all of these are great and instrumental in making a relationship a safe haven, it's still worthy of noting that not everyone cherishes the same thing, which leads to our love languages. As partners, we need to know our partner's love languages, so we'll be channeling our energy towards them and not something else you believe everyone should like.
Through the years, I've witnessed many marriages and relationships crumble due to one issue or another. It's saddening because I've been in that shoe before, and I know how hurtful that could be. But in this regard, while we focus on making the future a wonderful one for us and the children, we shouldn't neglect the present to the point where we don't do things that make our partners feel special, appreciated, and special in the moment because the heart is a fragile part of our body that can be enticed by someone else, especially when the one who ought to be enticing it isn't.Love languages are broken down into 5 according to a book I read several years ago, and they're:
- Words of affirmation
- Quality time
- Physical touch
- Acts of service
- Receiving gifts
Each of these looks great and is something anyone will cherish, which is true, but the truth is that per individual, there's one that carries more weight than the others; we must know that of our partner. I think mine revolves around two that I elaborated on below:Personally, for me, when it comes to my love language, I believe it's mostly all about quality time. I tend to appreciate someone who spends time with me more than someone who gives me a gift. That doesn't mean I don't cherish gifts; it just means that for me as a person, I tend to love and get drawn towards someone who gives me their time and attention.
With my life through the years and my previous relationship, this has been made evident on several occasions, but aside from quality time and attention being given to me, I believe I'm the kind of person who also cherishes acts of service rendered to me or a course I'm aware of. Through the years, this has played out on many occasions that have made me have this belief. I think both of those best describe my love language, but the first and major one is quality time.
While I write this, I remember the story of one of my neighbors in the house I stayed in during my undergraduate days at the university. There happened to be this young couple. I stayed in that house for about two years to get to know them to some extent, and one thing I realized is that although they love each other, the wife still doesn't know her husband's love language. I mean, this is a guy who, like me, appreciates quality time, but all the wife does is say words of affection but gets carried away by her job, arriving late several hours after work hours.
While all this was playing out, the husband was seeing another lady who was giving him attention, and, you know, he started having extramarital affairs, and before the wife would discover and change, the guy had already gotten the other lady pregnant. This crushed their marriage and led to their divorce, although I don't buy the idea of how the guy went about it and feel he should have been able to refrain himself.
But then love languages carry weight, and it takes grace and a high level of discipline to not fall victim if someone else who isn't your partner appreciates you with your love language and your partner doesn't or refuses to yield to your cry for them to take note of it.
This is my entry for Day 21 of #aprilinleo for the Inleo initiative. You can also join us by reading all the details in the announcement post.
That's about it for now. I hope you enjoyed the read. Have a wonderful day, and stay blessed.
Thumbnail designed on canva