Hello. I know well that feeling of being in a negative spiral in which everything is darkness and fear, to the point of not wanting to live anymore so as not to have pain. I've been there.
I also know what writing can help. It's important to get those thoughts out of the mind. It won't solve the problems but they relieve the load and bring you closer to the light. Little by little, try to feel a little better just for today. And tomorrow to start again. Sometimes just breathing costs a lot of effort, I know. Little by little.
If you have Discord, my user there is the same as in Hive. You can talk to me whatever you need. You are not alone. A hug.
RE: Judge-Mental-Beings Rambling And Daubing