Taxes, Entitlements, and How They Work

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Hi friends, today I'd like to explain taxes and entitlements. I will explain what they are and how they work. Let’s get started! The first thing you should know is that entitlements are not a bad thing. They are a great thing. Great! Fantastic! Without them we would all murder each other. Here’s how it works.

Let’s say you go to the burger joint and give them your money. It entitles you to get something in return. Like food. Then you go to a hotel and give them money. It entitles you to get something in return for your money, like a room and bed. Giving people money entitles you to get something in return. That’s how the word entitlement works. The problem comes in when people think they deserve things for free. Do you think you are entitled to an iPhone? No, you aren’t unless you gave the person at the iPhone store money. Then you are entitled to get something in return for your money. Your parents don’t have to buy you one. Did you give your parents money? No, you didn’t. Are you entitled to a car on your 18th birthday? No, you aren’t. Did you buy your parents' car? If you gave your parents money for their car, then it entitled you to get it. If you think you are entitled to get a car because you’re alive, you’re wrong. Sorry.

When it comes to paying taxes, it also entitles you to get something for your money. Like, nice roads, a competent Fire Dept., Police that don’t kill you. Stuff like that. You have given the government money and so it entitled you to get something in return. If you are giving the government money and getting nothing in return, that’s wrong. Social Security is an entitlement because you paid money for it. It isn’t free. Neither was the burger you purchased, remember? The hotel room wasn’t free either. You paid for it. You are entitled to receive the things you purchase.

When you pay your state taxes, the state government uses that money to hire police, firemen, build roads and bridges, and do other stuff in your town. When you pay your federal taxes the country you live in uses that money to build freeways between states, bridges, pay the military, and fund various government programs. Programs like Social Security, Welfare, and if you’re lucky, Universal Health Care. Some things are paid for with your state taxes and some things are paid with your federal taxes. You are entitled to all of them because you paid for them. You are entitled to get them in exchange for your money.

What happens if you don’t pay your taxes? Nothing happens. No police or fire department, roads and bridges fall apart, and the military runs out of bullets. Old people become homeless, and if you lose your job, you’re screwed. A lot of bad things happen if you don’t pay your taxes. But can’t we privatize all of that? No, well yes, but it would make the world suck.

What if your house catches fire? Your house burns down and the firemen charge you $50,000 to put it out. That sucks. You lost your home and now you’re in debt. How much does it cost for a police investigation? I’m fairly sure it’s expensive because crimes aren’t solved in an hour like on TV. In real life it takes a long time and a lot of manpower. That adds up. Soon, people will stop reporting crimes because they can’t afford it. Who will pay the paving company to fix the road? Your neighborhood association? What if the neighborhood next to yours doesn’t want to pay or can’t afford it? You have a nice road next to a bad road. What about highways? Highways will need to become toll roads. Say $2 per mile. I live 470 miles from Disneyland. Good grief! I guess I won’t be going to Disneyland soon.

Everything becomes crappy if you privatize it. Would you like to live in a world like that? That's not the world for me. So what’s the moral of the story? Taxes are a good thing. We need them, and; you are entitled to get something for your tax money. You shouldn’t freak out every time you hear the word entitlement.

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