My experience with not vaccinating my child

I have to admit that I'm really scared to post this. I actually have butterflies about it, but I'm going to press post. I know that this is a controversial subject that polarises people. I want to get my experience of not getting my child vaccinated out there so that others can see a perspective from a first time mum on the subject. So please, feel free to comment and discuss but please be kind.

I'm not vaccinated. I don't believe in vaccines. My 8 month old daughter is not vaccinated and she never will be (unless she decides to do so once she's an adult).

My siblings have all been vaccinated. I'm the youngest in my family and luckily my wonderful mother stood up to my father and for once she won an argument. This meant that I was able to avoid getting those horrible injections. I remember being the only child in my school who didn't get vaccinated. I had to sit and wait while my friends and other students got injected. A lot of them were returning to class with tears in their eyes. I'm forever grateful to mum for not making me go through that.

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Fast forward to more recently when I was pregnant with my daughter. Since the day I had my pregnancy confirmed early last year I have had vaccines, flu shots and medical drugs pushed at me. I declined every single one, much to the dismay of my midwife and doctors. They were especially concerned about me because I'm not vaccinated. It's not something that I usually raise with people, but my midwife did a screen of my blood and she asked me if I was vaccinated because she saw that I was "at risk" for contracting illnesses as I don't have the antibodies. I was intrigued, but politely declined.

My baby is now 8 months old and I've been declining any kind of vaccines for my wee girl since the day she took her first breath. It's getting to a point where I feel bullied by my doctor and my well child nurse due to my decision not to vaccinate. Here in NZ we have to have our babies checked by a nurse periodically as your baby grows. The frequency of seeing the nurse decreases (thankfully). Every time I go I'm asked when I'll be getting her vaccinated. Every time my answer is the same..."I'm not."

The last appointment that I went to with the nurse was the worst one yet. So bad that I'm considering not going back. The nurse (she was a different nurse to my usual one) incorrectly assumed that my daughter was 'up to date' with her vaccines. I told her that we're not vaccinating her. The nurse tried to get into a debate with me about it trying to convince me to change my mind. There's been a story in the news here recently about a screening of the show Vaxxed that was interrupted by a doctor. The doctor took to the stage and told the audience that their presence "would cause babies to die".
You can see the article here:
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=11862206

This news story was what my nurse wanted to debate with me and then she started asking me what I will do when they change the law to make vaccines compulsory for having your child attend daycare. I really didn't want to discuss it with her and I felt horrible being stuck in the room with her. I feel that she was crossing a line by badgering me about my choice not to vaccinate. I told her that it wouldn't be an issue for me either way because I'm staying home with my girl, so she won't be attending daycare. Once the nurse realised that I wasn't going to get into a debate with her she finally moved on and continued doing her job.

My doctor (who I avoid and was only there for a mandatory check up for my baby) lectured me about vaccines. Saying how I'm putting my baby at risk by not getting her vaccinated. She then went on to tell me a story about an 18 year old boy who had recently died from chickenpox. I mean, that's terrible but I couldn't understand why she was telling me this other than to try to scare me into getting vaccinated and getting my girl vaccinated. I had chickenpox as a child and I survived. The worst thing I got from it was a tiny wee scar from where I couldn't stop scratching a particular sore!

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Is that what they do, the medical professionals? They can't legally force me to have my daughter vaccinated so they are preying on my fears to try to scare me into getting her vaccinated? It is scary. Hearing about little babies dying due to diseases. I don't want her to die. In fact, it would kill me if anything happened to her. Trust me, I'm not doing this as some kind of experiment. I genuinely don't want to have her pumped with chemicals.
We are back to eating organic fruits and vegetables, now that she's eating solid foods, to avoid her little organs getting overloaded with chemicals. Why would I then inject chemicals in?
Other mothers I know tell me how upset their children are after getting their shots and how they have to then give them more drugs (pain relief) to calm them down afterwards. It just seems so wrong to me and I can't and won't put my girl through that. If it makes me a social outcast then so be it.

It's a choice that is for my partner and I to make. It makes me annoyed that I'm having to defend my choice with every medical professional I cross paths with. I feel bullied and pressured. I'm a people pleaser by nature and usually would cave to pressure like this but I can't. It feels wrong to inject my beautiful little girl. It feels gross and I'm following my mothers instinct and not doing it. Ever.

I hope that over time I will get better at speaking up to the doctors and nurses. I don't want to feel attacked or belittled just because of my choice.
I really have seen a new side to our medical professionals since not following their rules. I can only wait and see what else happens on this journey.

Images: www.pixels.com

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