What’s the worst that could happen tonight, the most loaded night of the year? You could have no one to kiss or no one to get drunk with, or worse — you could have both and still not have a good time. It’s so much pressure and even the nicest things you can think of will likely involve so much “walking outside” and “being in a crowd” and “money,” that it couldn’t possibly be worth it. A new year? I’ve seen 940 of them already. An alternate plan that I believe is very good is to sit at home and watch a warm, non-challenging movie about love and friendship and wearing turtlenecks under blazers. For example: the best New Year’s Eve movie of all time, Nora Ephron’s When Harry Met Sally, which features an unhelpful explanation of the song “Auld Lang Syne.”
HARRY: My whole life I have never known what this song means.
SALLY: I know exactly what you mean.
HARRY: I mean, should old acquaintance be forgot. Does that mean we should forget old acquaintances, or does it mean if we do happen to forget them, we should remember them, which is not possible because we forgot them —
SALLY: Maybe you’re just supposed to remember you forgot them, or something — anyway, it’s about old friends.