RE: In Moments of Dark Despair

You may rest assured that limbs severed by the wind grow back again, and pain never hurts so much the second, third or fourth time...

This reminds me of something that happened over the holidays. I visited my family for the first time in two years, for the first time since my son was born. On January first, after days and days of my step father, my mother and my eldest brother (21) heavy drinking, a fight broke out between my eldest and youngest brothers, blood and crawling on the floor and screaming threats of death... I had never seen something like this. They took the little one away and a verbal fight that seemed to last forever between my brother, mom and her husband started, all the while refering to my brother having "emotional issues" and having spent "5,000$ in shrinks" on his behalf and there having been no improvement. I was hiding in the next room with my husband, listening but thinking it was not right for me to step in, because my step-father's energy is just too big and too drunk and too harsh for me to handle (I had had a taste of his drunken, poisonous rant two nights before). Drugs came into the issue as well, and when my brother accused the other two siblings of smoking weed too, his father did not believe him, even though I saw them smoking too. (Im not selling them out, that is not my party).

There is a fine line between emotional distress and mental illness, and maybe drugs are not as bad as other things. I think weed actually helps my brother, and I hope he will be strong enough to quit it when he stops needing it. I just wish my mother could understand that.

But mother's are made of some harder type of stardust, aren't they? For better and worse.

A distant hug for you in your dark hours.