The Language(s) of Love

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I'm assuming that most of you know what love languages are, or have at least heard of them.

For those who don't, they are the way we communicate love, not just to someone we are romantically in love with, but also family, friends, anyone we love.

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There are five main love languages that we all communicate with, whether we realize it or not. Most of us have one or two that are at the top of the list, meaning they are the ones we communicate with, and wish to receive the most.

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1. Words of Affirmation

Words of affirmation simply means, you enjoy when someone tells you how much you mean to them, or you show love by telling someone how much you appreciate something or how much you love them. Unfortunately, in some cases, your love language can actually work against you, meaning you will likely take to heart anything negative anyone says to you, and may hold onto it for a long time, finding it hard to move on.

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2. Gifts

This is one simple enough. Some people communicate through gifts, not always being something bought, just the act of giving something to another person. Often though, it is preferred that there is meaning behind the gift, and not just something random.

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3. Acts of Service

Acts of service includes doing something that will help another person, doing the dishes, folding the laundry, getting them something to drink (shout out to my hubby for doing just that while I was writing this post). Basically anything that is helpful, and will make that person smile. It can be something small, such as making sure they have their favorite towel for their shower, or something as big as cooking a fancy dinner for them, or planning a surprise vacation. People who's love language is acts of service enjoy the thought that was put into making their day better or doing something thoughtful to make their day easier/ more enjoyable.

For example: my husband picked a flower on his way home, and placed it beside my pillow for me to wake up to(:

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4. Physical Touch

This one may seem obvious, and although it does include sexual touch, non-sexual is included as well. Simply holding hands, cuddling, anything where two people are touching is under the umbrella. This actually happens to be one of my top love languages, and I like nothing better than to be cuddled, or him (the hubs) reaching out to hold my hand, rub my shoulder, put his arm around me etc. This is another one that can work against you, because when I am angry, I don't like to be touched by the object of my rage, often leading to hurt feelings/making the problem worse .

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5. Quality Time

Quality time is defined differently for different people. For some, it is having an uninterrupted conversation, for others, going and doing something together, while sometimes, it can simply be defined as "being together". In my case, that is what it consists of. As quality time and touch are about equal with me, it is one of the most important things in my book. I'm one of those that don't require talking or doing anything, just being together, even being in the same room to me is quality time. As is the case with most of these, this love language can also be a negative. For instance, if your counterpart is busy all the time, and it seems they never have time for you, then you might start feeling neglected or lonely.

Once you understand love languages, it is much easier to navigate relationships, as you start to understand what makes them tick. Even if your honey speaks a different love language than you, you can always always practice and cultivate your other love languages.

My hubby speaks a totally different love language than me, but because I know this, I have slowly gotten used to it, and able to communicate with him in ways that he will appreciate more

Did you know about love languages ? What is your love language ? Do you and your spouse speak the same one ? I'd love to know !

Much Love
Rie<3

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