I kept it a secret for three years
...as my mother was truly disappointed when she learned I got secretly married once I was back in Mexico from Vancouver.
A few months prior I thought that I might only find my life partner at an older age… Later thanks to a talk to a good friend I realized that it was only a mental complex. I told myself “I believe there is someone out there ready for me to build a life of common dreams and the commitment towards a healthy community life.”
And what did I do? I emptied drawers of my closet (to give space in my life to my life partner), dedicated myself to my daily practice, let go of fears, guilt and self pity… 3 months later I met him online, 2.5 more months we met in person, 10 days later we got married, 6 more months we moved together, 5 years after my decision here I am, and with a beautiful 3 month old baby in my arms.
Something different had happened, we both knew we wanted to build a beautiful life and were committed to it. I know God’s rules work that way: ask with your heart, make a commitment, and the decisions will be fruitful. I truly believe that every human being has the right to find a soulmate relationship of care, respect, bliss and trust. Everything starts by the work in oneself, which never ends.
The benefits of Online Dating
There is a great deal of benefits to online dating when you really want to find a long-term relationship, dating online while living in different cities, different countries or even continents allow the space to really get to know the other person before you get into the passion of it. For instance, we all get sexually attracted and when physical affection gets in the way you spend more time doing that (aka having sex, making out, kissing, hugging) than actually getting to know the other person.
Once you are sexually involved with someone is harder to break up, while if you date from distant places, and you got to know each other it is easier to break up if you think it is not going to work in the long run. Marc was in Vancouver and I was in Merida, Mexico; that distance made a difference to us because when we finally met in person we were pretty convinced we wanted to be with each other.
Make Up Your Mind About What is Important to You and Don’t Be Afraid to Express it
It is crucial that you know what is essential for your life, for me it was my yoga practice, healthy eating and that I am basically not a hard party person, I had to be dead serious with @marcsoer and I even told him why my roommate hated to be my roommate, because she felt like she was living with her grandma.
Women Have Intuition, Men Have Arrows
I know men have intuition too, but thanks to the way the energy works through the womb, we women are more inclined to have more connection with our intuition, our “gut feeling”.
Every time Marc expressed his opinion about an important topic as we were online dating, such as family, money, work, dreams, health, etc., there was a voice inside me that said “that is the RIGHT answer”.
For him, it wasn’t like he felt he was being intuitive about me, he had simply made the decision he wanted to get established as a family man, get married have kids with a person that shared his values. He thinks Love at first sight is Disney BS. That is why I expressed to it as arrows, he knew what he aimed and he followed the signals that took him there.
Once You Are Married or in a Long Term Committed Relationship a New Journey Begins
My aunt who is now in her fifth marriage said “If one thing I’ve learned from having been married 5 times is that no partner is perfect, and the beauty is when you work through each other’s flaws."
Last July 7th (our 3rd anniversary) we went out for dinner and after two sips of wine I felt sick, then I was certain I was pregnant (actually my profile picture was taken right at that moment). This year we will celebrate our fourth anniversary with an addition to our family, our first beloved child.
I was never good with boyfriends, not in my teens nor in my early twenties, there is a perfect someone for everyone, but remember you have to work to be a better person. In order to find someone that will inspire you to be better. Don’t expect to find someone inspiring when you live constantly depressed, meet or work towards the energy levels that you want your partner to have.