1.Apologize for Your Mistakes
If your girlfriend is breaking up with you because you did something that hurt her feelings, it is pretty clear what you need to do to change her mind. Look into her eyes, hold her hands, and give her an unconditional apology. Tell her how sorry you are and how much you regret making that mistake.
Accept your faults. Don’t try to correct her when she starts ranting and blaming you for all the problems that happened. A girl may not take a guy back if he has cheated on her but other small mistakes and annoying behaviors might be forgiven if the apology is genuine.
- Talk
I put this one last for a reason. Sure, you can confront her and tell her you think she’s leaving. Either you’re right and she’s going to either deny it or tell you, “Yeah, I’ve had thoughts”. Or you’ll be wrong and she’ll deny it. Either way, she’s either telling you it’s over or your making accusations. That’s not a good way to win her back.
Don’t get me wrong; there is no bigger part of a relationship than communication. But the art of communication is in the timing of it.
Once again, let the game come to you. Do the nostalgic stuff. Do the romantic thing. Show more interest in her life and generally put more effort into the relationship. She’ll notice, and eventually she’ll bring up the subject. That’s your opening to talk about what’s on your mind, in a situation where you’ve demonstrated you’re taking steps to make the relationship better.
Of course, if things have gotten to the point that she’s on the way out the door, you can’t exactly afford to let the game come to you. At that point, talking is the only recourse you have. You might have to invert my advice for helping the long term relationship, and promise to do all of the above
3.Hash out your grievances.
Once you and your partner have had time to yourselves, meet back up to exercise your conflict resolution skills. Take a look at which parts of the relationship aren’t working and work together to find solutions.
This step might go easier if both partners make a list of your major grievances with the relationship. Do so by clearly defining the problem in detail. Then, separately, brainstorm some possible solutions to the issues on your list.
Come back together and share your grievances. Then, offer suggestions for how you and your partner can overcome these obstacles.
4.Make a Promise and Keep It
Differences, habits, personality traits, and other trivial issues can snowball into deal-breakers that lead to a breakup. If there is something specific that is making your girlfriend want to dump you, a tough decision will have to be made on your side.
You will either have to accept the breakup or make a promise to address that issue if you want to save your relationship. For example, if your girlfriend is breaking up with you because of the fact that you are friends with a girl she hates, you will have to take a side. You will have to choose between being with your girlfriend and not talking to the other girl or let your girlfriend break up with you so that you can keep talking to the other girl.
5.Get Romantic
Finally, try to bring romance back into the romance. It can’t all be about the past.
Find new and fresh things to do. Get out of the usual pattern. If the sex life around the house is stale, rent a hotel room for the night. It’s amazing what a change of scenery can do for the love life
6.Talk to Your Girlfriend’s Best Friend
Your girlfriend’s BFF might hold the spare key to her heart if yours doesn’t work anymore. Go and talk to her bestie and share your feelings with sincerity and honesty. Try to convince her how madly you love your girlfriend. Lay your heart bare and get her on your side.
Listening to your emotional pleas should ideally convince her that you are the perfect guy for her best friend. If everything goes well, she will speak to your girlfriend and ask her to stick it out with you.
7.Request a little time.
To prevent your breakup, get ahead of the problem. Pull your partner aside to talk. Let them know your suspicions about the impending breakup and ask for some time to mend things. Agree on a time-frame.
You might say something like, “I get the sense you’re preparing to break up with me. Can you please give us some time to try and make things right? Can we give it one more month?”You can also use this extra time to do a little soul-searching and decide whether it’s really a good idea for the relationship to continue.
8.Don’t Be Needy
One of the big problems guys have in a relationship is coming on too strong. This is a fine line, because you want to let her know what’s on your mind. At the same time, the last thing you want to do is come off as needy.
If you’ve been sending flowers and notes and you’re trying to call her everyday, you might think that is “worshipping the ground she walks on”. Those may not be the signals she’s receiving. A woman in this situation might be wondering why you would be putting out such an effort. The natural conclusion is you have nothing better to do, that you are desperate for attention and therefore not much of a catch.
You have to let the game come to you. There’s obviously something about you she finds attractive. But if you start the flower petal act, your basically letting her know you’re an easy catch. There’s no challenge to you, and she’ll eventually figure she can find someone better.
9.Don’t Confide
I’m not saying you shouldn’t tell her any of your secrets. I’m telling you to be careful and not tell her too many of your secrets.
Once again, this is coming on too strong. If you share one or two skeletons in your closet, she might think, “He’s opening up.” If you start to tell her your entire life and you’re wanting advice and positive feedback, she’s going to think you’re a little creepy.
For one, she’ll wonder why you don’t have someone else to confide in about this stuff. Two, you probably don’t want all this negative stuff to be what is informing her opinions of you. Wait a while and let your past fall into its proper context. She might even think you are mysterious. Really, it couldn’t hurt.
10.Put Out More Effort
This is an outgrowth of the previous suggestion. If you have gotten too comfortable in your romance, then you probably don’t put out much of an effort for it anymore.
Think about it. This is presumably the most important relationship in your life. You want all these things out of it, so you need to put time back into it. Maybe you like the fact that you can relax and enjoy life without the hassle, but that’s not the way the world works. Women may be “high maintenance”, but then they should be.
A new relationship is like a new car. You can stop doing routine maintenance and eventually the car will start to break down and fall apart. Is it any wonder that a woman might eventually decide to buy a new car?
So show her you’re interested in the relationship. If you’ve been together a while and been through a lot of things, she’ll notice and give you a lot of credit