Why Didn't I Get the Secret Password to Success? This is a Huge Teaching Point. Shout out to @sunette for sharing her story.
It was only when I understood myself through understanding my emotions and the extent of effect / impact trauma and shock can have on a person throughout the years: did I find something within me I never knew could possible exist, nor did I immediately recognize it. Only after some time of walking this process of understanding myself, my mind and looking back - did I come to realize I started experiencing something within me, a fire, that was missing from as far back as I can remember: Peace. Once I defined this experience, this fire, within me that started emerging in my process…I was greatly surprised. Of all the things I was yearning for, searching for, believing I was wanting and needing - I get peace (lol). Yet, it was the one thing a part within me was in fact desiring - although I wasn't consciously aware of it within and throughout my life.
Procrastination, Unkempt, Insecurity and Inadequacy - The core words emerging, that have shaped the very nature of suppression within myself throughout my life.
Ironically these points have been gifts in a way to show me where/how/when/how I've accepted and allowed myself to exist as less than the best version of myself.
Humbleness, Humility, Vulnerability and Persistence - The support words in creating the living of Discipline. These core words are integral to me moving through the experience of resistance.
The initial experience and many times repeated mistake - Reacting to the realization and recognition of my very self-suppression. The word is "Devastation".
I didn't realize how extensively I would limit my ability to change myself in a moment of recognizing and realizing the nature of my self-imposed limitation. The reactionary experience of "devastation" would be so strong that I would basically inferiorize and pity myself - becoming so shocked and awed with my acceptance and allowance that I would go into a form of self-denial. This has been my self-deception. A coping mechanism of shutdown. Overwhelmed to say the least.
Ironically I didn't realize the extent of my self-deception. It became so common practice for me to abdicate my best living response ability.
Being honest with myself has been a really challenging process, Because in some way or another I've been lying/hiding from my weaknesses.
Humbleness, Humility, Vulnerability and Persistence are Core Support Words in enabling my ability to create my best responsibility in correcting the very nature of my word and world body structural alignment. Specificity in my word regard is the key to expanding my ability to live my best Response Ability.
From Reaction to Response Ability. Giving myself strong core support words to enable me having a structured balance and practical way to catch myself in a moment of reaction so that I can move effectively and efficiently in exercising my best real time living of my Response Ability.
I realize that by giving myself a strong foundation of support words, I am confidently able to build my life from a starting point of self-trust.
It's incredibly fascinating to see how very specific we humans are. For better or for worse.
I've realized it's in getting comfortable with the worst of myself - that I actually empower myself to reconstruct the very constitution of my word/world body politics.
My words are my world. I realize that when and as I face a moment of reaction and I go into an experience of 'devastation' as this super intense shock and awe - that it's actually a strong point of communication and a real cross reference of support that "Look and See Here - this is my point to sort out - take responsibility for.
My starting point base foundation in creating my best response ability is: Pro-For-Giving. Stemming from the living of Self-forgiveness. I gift myself the solution to my problem. The problem is always a point of inefficiency in my word/world regard.
I walk real time in the moment change. It's an on going thing. This is the ultimate limiting. Play Station Me. I am a play writer as I write my life rite - learning to live my words to the best of my abilities - challenging myself to expand the best of my abilities. Challenging myself to continuously improve upon the worst of my abilities.
My Life Process Journey is an ongoing thing as I continue on my quest of, "What does it mean to be a responsible human being?"
- Stay tuned as I continue to share :)
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