I've learned my lesson, time to step things up

(Pixerbay likes Trutles.)


A time of unlearning & re-learning

As I've been doing my best to "get on my feet" in the last 8 months, I've gone from blaming the "Bear" to looking at myself. This can either take the form of relentless, gut-wrenching regrets and "if only" thinking — or much more preferably — A) How can I prevent this mess from ever happening again and B) How can I rebuild from the crypto ashes?



The former is useless, destructive and promotes painful stagnation, while the latter, the analytical and unemotional approach, greatly increases the odds of a full recovery. Thing is, I'm naturally a labrynth of impulsivity, foolishness, wishful thinking, laziness and unnecessary despair. Some of you who may have a high view of me may see this as a surprise, while some of you have seen subtle (or clear) hints here and there. Whatever good traits I have don't spring from my natural self... I have to adopt, learn and practice them. I think that the natural, untamed overkillcoin would be a knuckle-dragging reprobate. How do I reign in this stupid beast inside me? Sure, it's one thing to encounter "life's unfair" events, but the natural me allows things to get out of hand and even pours gasoline on the flames of trials and tribulation.

One of my favourite quotes (whose author I've forgotten) is, "My greatest enemy is the inner me".


Turning my back to the garbage

But wait? Is it that easy though? Every day I have to take the "garbage" out in my mind... thoughts of hopelessness, for example. But like real life garbage, these thoughts can be manageable and minimalized. Martin Luther once said, “You cannot keep birds from flying over your head but you can keep them from building a nest in your hair” (his context geared toward sinful thoughts - in my case I'm focusing more specifically on self-sabotaging thoughts).

This brings up some crazy imagery for me. No one would want to have a stack of birds chilling on top on their heads, but how often do I tolerate far more destructive thoughts? There have been checkpoints in my life whereas I've botched some great opportunities up through fear, lack of confidence, doubt, you name it. It's time to declare war on this type of thinking I suppose.


Application to crypto

Pro traders will often say that the market is largely driven by feelings. One goes so far as to say that "emotions are the greatest money killer". I can see the point there. Over a year ago now, I was blinded by crypto-euphoria and to some extent, the notion that the world was finally waking up to the value of blockchain. When someone suggested I take profits off the table, I reacted in an indignant manner. Wow. Fast forward to today, and obviously, I have learned my lesson. Although the value of blockchain hasn't moved, prices certainly have.


Clinging too tightly to my holdings surely hasn't helped...


Any way, I've identified more specific emotion-driven habits in my crypto experience and have been doing my best to weed them out. It's so much easier said than done. I'm not privy to a lot of panic-buying or panic-selling, but I've done enough to know that I need to make a change.

I'm trading in very small amounts for now in order to get my mind fully on track with the literal and figurative ups and downs of the markets. I have been maintaining what I own well enough, but small losses cut like daggers since my overall life isn't going so smooth.

Never more than today, I've learned some profound life lessons through the crypto markets... I've encountered and confronted my fear, greed, worry, despair and other thought monsters. But a much larger battle lies ahead. I know the majority of what I need to know to better succeed in crypto... trading principles... protecting capital... risk management... But I'm at the point that I need to consistently counter the feelz and put disciplined knowledge into practice.

It's time to press ahead and keep my lesser self in check.

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