Who sent you? What are you here for?
I paced around the table on which the mysterious frogs lay. I had a light pointed directly at them and was wearing my sternest of stern faces.
Come on. Confess!
I slapped one hand against the other and rolled my cheeks into a fierce anus-like pose which I fancied might elicit some manner of confession from these two interlopers.
Nothing.
I had found them earlier. Sitting on the table in the lounge. One was facing the kitchen and the other toward the front door. As if they were covering each other's backs. It had instantly roused my suspicions.
What the very devil is going on here?!
I had blasted like an army sergeant playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey with some German sailors as the realisation dawned that he was the donkey and the tail was kind of meaty.
The frogs did not move or indeed show any sign of fear.
Almost as if they were not of this earth at all?
That was it! Could they be alien artefacts? Were they even now scanning me and assessing me for intelligence before descending to earth to mutilate my cattle?
Fuck, I didn't even have any cattle.
Maybe I should lawyer up. Would that work against Aliens? I was running out of options.
A noise from the hall made me whip around and I flung a hand to my side ready to fling faeces at the first sign of any alien scum and their probey badsticks.
Hey you. Whatcha up to?
It was the Good Lady.
I relaxed, although not entirely. She could have been body snatched after all.
These things.
I pointed at the frogs accusingly.
Oh they look yummy don't they? Wasn't that kind of Galen to send them? When can we get tucked in? I put the rest of the stuff he sent in the Fridge. I can't wait.
She wandered over to the table and her fingers stretched out toward the green frog.
I think this one is peppermint, I baggy that one.
I shook my head sternly at her.
I'm not finished with these yet lady, not by a long chalk...
Yer arse!
The Good Lady whipped the green frog up and away, cackling like a bin full of seagulls.
Hey! I funking love peppermint?!
I leapt after her.
Which is a long and roundabout way of saying thank you very much to the King of Titans @galenkp for sending a parcel of scrummy chocolates to the frozen north to help the Booms ride out Winter!
Hot damn, look at this trove of amaze. The kids want to swap out parents now and I don't blame them. I have never seen such a fine collection of chocolate bars and the frogs... Funking awesome! What a massive feast. Cheers mate!