I remember the first time I drank red wine.
I was barely 10 years old. My dad was about to get married for the second time. He and my soon-to-be-stepmom were not the best role models when it came to drinking.
It was pretty funny to tell my counselors at the YMCA summer camp where I was spending my summer days that I didn't want to go running around because I was hung over.
"What??"
They didn't understand.
I was a cool kid. I had snuck over to everyone's cup when they weren't looking and drank it all down. All of it. I drank all the wine that night. It was the first time I had ever REALLY been sick. I still got up and went to camp the next day though. That's what real men do.
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I remember the second time I drank red wine.
I was 11 years old with a heart full of innocence. What a joy it is to be young. My friend Robert and I had just walked home from the movies. It was a few minutes after noon and the sun was shining like a demon in the sky. We were hot.
My dad had a huge stash of bottles behind that new wooden bar he had built. There were several jugs of something red and tasty looking. It don't look like your typical stoic red. I believe it was Sangria.
I'll say this: It looked damn refreshing to a couple of boys suffering from something like heat stroke.
That afternoon Robert and I wandered into a basketball court and played a game against some neighborhood kids that we had never seen before. We were full of bravado. Crap-talking, if you please.
"I'm the best basketball player out there! You can't beat me!"
I had never played basketball before in my life.
I wound up curled up in a little ball with vomit all over my new green sweatshirt. Good times.
I remember the third time I drank red wine.
I was 12 years old and full of raging hormones. My cousin was having a huge party. His parents had rented out the entire floor of a local country club. I had never seen so many pretty girls. Being a somewhat introverted kid, I had never even danced with a girl my own age. That would change on this night.
One thing I remember very clearly was UB40. Over the loudspeaker system a particular song called "Red, Red Wine" played again and again. It was very relevant to what was going on this evening. You see, the adults had brought more alcohol than they possibly knew what to do with, and they weren't really feeling keen on keeping a close watch of their kids.
All the kids danced, and laughed, and ate until our stomachs were close to bursting. More than anything though..... we drank. We drank and drank and drank some more.
I remember a beautiful young blond that was wearing a little glitter covered white dress. I asked her to dance over and over. She said yes every time. It was the best evening of my life!
I woke up with my head on the toilet seat of the girl's bathroom. Why the girl's room? I don't know. I can tell you one thing, though. The reason I didn't get into trouble with my parents was because my older sister had her head on the very next toilet over.
She got yelled at. She was supposed to be watching me, I guess.
Of course our parents never took the blame for any of it. Things would be different in this day and age.
Those aren't the only times I've ever had red wine, of course. They just might be the most memorable though.
