THE STRUGGLE IS REAL | Real Life vs. Steem Life

I have been struggling!

Above is an honest confession. Never in my life I struggled so much until I met Steem. You see, I am a mother of 2 boys, one with health condition, hence I quit my job to take care of him at home permanently. Stay-at-home-mom so to speak. Then, I met Steem, hopefully I could earn some extra to ease the burden of household's expenditure. Remember the price during December 2017? I could remember every post and blog meant "ka-ching" aka cash aka prosperity for us. So, I tried to be hardworking, getting to know people, joining contests, build relationship, so on and so forth. Up till today even the price plunges, I still love Steem. Too bad, I can't leave Steem because I am loyal and faithful. It is my nature. You will see me here as long as Steem is alive.

But then, I struggled too.

I realised the time I spent here was at the expense of my children's emotional and developmental needs. Before this, they could understand, I told them I need to work. Every posts was money. But now, Steem has become my side pleasure, you know, like majority of us who sit on the couch or lie down browsing Facebook or Instagram. No more earning money from Steem.

So I struggled.

Does it worth my time here, working so hard (I really used to spend more than 8 to 10 hours on Steem)? Then I was torn in between, in dilemma. I noticed my children need me badly. In their development, in getting comfort and companion and attention, not to mention the basic element, love, lots of hugs and kisses and play. And then talking, chitchatting. I am their best friends. And I am their superhero too!

Real Life vs. Steem Life

Therefore, for some time, I have decided, to invest moreeee time in them than in Steem. I cut off alot of commitment here one by one, so that I have extra time to go play bubbles with them, kick ball, be silly with them, go to the park with them, read lots of books with them, and many more stuff WITH THEM. Steem can wait. But children grow up fast and the input from me to them won't wait.

One day, and the one day will come soon, they won't need me anymore, they will prefer to chitchat with their friends. And that is the time I can fly freely on Steem again. Haha.

Does that mean I leave Steem?

Big No! I love Steem! I love the people here!

This is the place I hang out. This is my social life since I am stucked at home most of the time. This is my pleasure 'work'. With #newsteem on the groove, I can enjoy reading and curating. If I can't make daily post, I won't nail myself, as I used to commit to make one post a day here. Or two posts. Or even 3 to 4 posts. Lol... I don't have the luxury of time now, but to be on Steemiverse to read and curate....ahhhh..no problem for me. Thank you #newsteem. 😊❤️

Now, the plan is, daily I will read and do my normal curating quota, and then free myself from phone to attend to real life.

I love to spend time with the boys. I love to keep the house clean. Etc. I love doing alot of activities with them.

And at night, when the boys are asleep, IF IF ONLY, my body's and brain's battery is still full, I will make a post. I have been wanting to make this post, but real life pops at me again and again everytime I lift up my phone to type, and I decide to put this plan of blogging to halt for awhile.

I used to say to my kids when they needed me, "Please wait, mummy is busy now." And then, they really waited patiently. Awwww... So nice of them.

I have changed my strategy. If they need me now, I put down my phone and attend to their needs. Like I said, Steem can wait. (please don't judge me, I still love Steem alot). I envy those who can spend alot of time on Steem, really, I envy. But not with wicked feeling. I know my time will come when I have more free time. But for now, the 5-year-old and the 8-year-old are my priorities. 💪💪💪