Here, in this corner of the world, in a few hours I will turn 19 years old, and an understanding comes to me that I will not be young forever, time is running out, and it's sad.
For this year I have grown wiser, changed a lot, my 18 years in some sense were turning, my mind expanded and opened, my experience greatly expanded, in all respects. I became much more confident in myself, I got some kind of calm on this account, I stopped hating myself, learned to admire myself and reconciled with who and what I am. I learned to accept myself in the form that I am and squeeze out of myself the maximum recoil in the right situations
Damn, for this year I spent almost month in Holland, I was working in a pizzeria, I had time to hang out in different parties, break a couple of hearts, fall in love and more than once, break my heart into pieces and reassemble in one, many times to get drunk, flirt with many guys, to part with the former boyfriend, who turned out to be a tyrant and a sadist. I regained the ability to cry and laughing, I often spent many hours studying, read a huge pile of books, acquired many friends, went to places of my childhood, made myself a tattoo on the sacrum, several times repainted my hair, and maybe for the first time in many years, I fell in love with life.
Even now, I'm sitting on a lonely kitchenette in a small apartment that does not even belong to me, in two hours, I'll turn 19, I'll pour myself a glass of dry wine, which I found in the pantry. I'll include some song.... I have not yet decided which one, and I'll be fine.
It can not be otherwise, my friends! I love you all =)
