Why is it that every time we feel sad and depressed, we go back to those same melancholy tracks instead of listening to uplifting songs that are actually supposed to make us feel better?
Why do we still choose to treasure our sadness even when we clearly have a better alternative to make ourselves feel happy and joyful almost instantly? At first thought, this doesn't really make much sense.
Listening to sad songs because you're sad is a really normal thing to do, but why? This question is a little tricky because when we are sad, the expected thing would be for us to want to get rid of that feeling as fast as we can, but instead we choose to multiply it.
But what's interesting is that it actually does make a lot of sense because sadness is a more artistic and aesthetically pleasing emotion to us humans as compared to all the other emotions because what it hints at is something that we all have - unfulfilled desires.
It may be the desire to have someone love you back, or the desire to not feel lonely, or the desire to relive your childhood memories, or the desire to prove yourself to the world. Anything. We all know what it feels like when some of our strongest desires are left unfulfilled.
This is exactly what makes sadness so beautiful. When shared, it reminds us of how we are not alone and how other people around the world have been through the same things that we have and are suffering just as much as we are.
How Sad Music Heals
At its core, sadness is actually our greatest tool for connection because when we share our sadness with other people and listen to their stories, it makes us feel like we belong somewhere, even if those people are strangers and we don't know anything about them.
If you think about it, the fact that sad music can make us feel comfortable and sometimes better is actually quite amazing because sadness is often portrayed as a feeling that makes you feel supposedly worse than before. But in reality, sadness is far more complicated than that.
When you listen to sad music, you are synchronizing your mental state with that of the artist which builds that strong unspoken emotional connection between you and them which further makes you realize how you are not alone in your suffering.
When I listen to sad music on YouTube, I often scroll down in the comments and read everything that people had to say about the song and how it made them feel, and their own stories and how they had been hurt by someone they love.
It's so comforting to hear other people share their pain because it gives you the strength to do the same and to let out whatever you've been wanting to say. It's almost like you've "found your tribe" when you relate and empathize with these people and feel a strange connection in that safe space where you are allowed and encouraged to grieve.
Another beautiful way in which sad music heals us is how it triggers the good memories that we had lived in the past. It reminds us of those amazing moments that we got to experience, even if we can never have them back again.
It makes us reminisce about the sweet drama of our stories and how we treasure those stories because they provide our lives with meaning, fulfillment, and gratefulness. We may be sad that those memories had to end, but we're happy knowing that they happened in the first place.
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