I've never asked myself that, Mrs. Merit, I always try to be explicit, to make myself understood.
I guess that's why I take it for granted in my conscience that I gave no room for doubt, and I've never questioned that.
Even with my children, they have often told me that they now understand "X or Y circumstance" because of something that I have made clear in the past.
It is impossible to like everyone and that everyone loves us, I am one of those who thinks that the criticisms, judgments and opinions speak of the one he is talking about (human projections).
I also think, Mrs Merit, that I am a very simple woman, I don't complicate myself so as not to complicate the existence of others.
I have had many states of adrenergic excitement "adrenaline rush" in my life. But not all of them have been for pleasure.
The first one that comes to mind, was when we had been living in Caracas for a year, my first child out of the three that I have was barely born and J.R. my husband, had severe bronchitis aggravated by an asthmatic picture, a situation that made us move from our house, and we went to the medical emergency, his conditions improved, after being 24 hours in the emergency, which did not merit hospitalization, but outpatient treatment at our house.
When we entered the apartment. My first daughter was one year old, and she ran towards what she would take to her dad, and our little girl did it intuitively.
J.R. tenderly lifted her up with his arms, and that effort caused her to go into respiratory arrest. As I could, I had to carry him to the elevator, put him in the car, the clinic was “two eternal blocks away” and for those who know the capital of my country, there was a queue on the road from the exit of the parking lot of the building at that time of the morning... this is in El Cafetal, east of Caracas.
Faced with my husband's emergency, I skipped the central island and by the opposite way (against way) swallowing the arrow, traffic lights I arrived at the clinic, I had already called the emergency that treated us in the conditions in which we were going, and they waited for us with the stretcher in the parking lot, and they did CPR from there because I was already unconscious.
The movie of my life... happened to me in 5 min, in slow motion because of the brain. I was stuck against the wall of the exhausted emergency, without words, without tears, just watching the show until he recovered to the integrum, my beloved husbands... it's been years of this and when I was writing to you, about this event from my real life, my eyes filled with tears from that adrenaline rush.
Thank God mom and Dad were at home with my daughter because they had come to get a medical checkup, to be delivered to the US embassy, by then in Caracas, before emigrating from the country for good. Currently, we do not have a US embassy in our country... those are other stories full of a lot of cortisols !.
I am currently going through another event…
Very sad because on Saturday my sister-in-law (my husband's sister) suffered a stroke and is hospitalized on Margarita Island, Nueva Esparta state, Venezuela. He has responded very little to treatment and his diabetic and cardiac condition has aggravated the prognosis, I have been following the process from here, but that does not console me.
She is still very delicate, barely in a state of superficial consciousness and with a very fragile metabolic and cardiovascular stability.
Rosa, my niece, traveled today from the Dominican Republic, her brothers are waiting for her, on the island of Margarita. I continue to support them emotionally so that they are prepared to help and no longer be an obstacle, as well as so that they are prepared without guilt to the designs of the Lord...
She has been in serious situations due to her insufficient heart before and has risen from the ashes like the phoenix, so we know about her attachment for life... only, the slower the recovery, the more opportunities there are for complications... in short, it is an exercise of patience and concentration so as not to get carried away by catastrophic thoughts.
Do not be afraid, because I am with you... myself.
I left my home to go to college in another city when I was only 15 years old. As scared as I was, I was so eager to discover, explore, learn, grow.
It's okay to feel afraid, it's natural for most of us to be afraid of plunging into the unknown, of uncertainty, of unfamiliarity, of not knowing what's going to happen. But taking a leap of faith and throwing yourself into the unknown can be very rewarding, and it's another natural reason for the body to get an adrenaline rush and keep going.
To finish this post I share to all the Ladies Of the Hive and to you Mrs. Merit, this jump to this cenote in Tulum, Mexico, 2017.
In this life, everything is relative. There is nothing like normal. The common thing is an attachment. You have to be flexible and wait until the unforeseen.
Janitze.
Separator made with Canva by @janitzearratia
Any images in this post are edited with Canva
Translation with |DeepL