My name is Matthew Ryan Shaeffer aka 42dareader0 / Desyfers Shaeffer ~ Depending if playing online Poker tournaments or Live Poker Tournaments ~ I am ranked in top 100 in online tournaments with multi millions of players at the age of 33 , I was a manager at 19 for Home Depot which lasted almost 7 years then went to Lowe's as a manager for about another 7 years and then things got interesting ~ I did something my family only gets now but not then and was the talk of family and friends in a non positive manner ~ Growing up I had great parents that showed me unconditional love and support and there famous words which for years they regretted while they didn't understand what or why I was doing what I was ~ I took a leap of faith and got cut up and slipped and fell often but I always got up sometimes not as fast as time before or a lil quicker but I willingly Left my Management role to one thing ~ Follow my dream and listen to my heart ~ Which today I thank also for giving me time to get involved and participate in crypto currencies and for the most part have a life not bound by normal typical life that most 9 to 5 jobs couldn't permit the freedom nor luxury to possess~ I was always blessed with math , numbers , qua relation and gift of identifying patterns and through management for years and all training a skill of communicating with all equally and got pretty well at reading people , Almost sense people's intentions and motives sometimes seemed almost before they new they had any or some ~ Poker Is roller coaster of a ride game which seems when you think your playing your best is almost like those are the moments you loose it all and have to start over ~ I lost my Bankroll a few times even have walked home almost 7 hour walks with not a penny left to my name ~ One night even after a horrible beat that beat my AA when they were bluffing and 4th and 5th card also known as turn and river hit his 2 and 7 giving him a multi thousand dollar pot and once again leaving me to this 7 hour walk back home , hopeless and distraught and even kinda confused on what am I doing in life and is this dream worth it ~ That night I even laid in a commentary Cursing at the creator as I was speaking to a grave I was laying by telling this grave how lucky they were . A gamblers life is not meant for every one but A risk taker I was and fearless was a strength and also weakness that made me realize who I am as I am~ I will go more in depth later on but few things I realized ~ Everything that Defined me in my head , or in the perspective of others opinions of me did any of that define me or have any substance to it or behind it ~ After losing it all few times ~ I realized ~ That group of people that I thought defined me from a social status defiantly did not define me ~ They aren't there when all is lost ~ Being a Manager over 13 years and kinda retiring by age 33 did not define me ~ I defined me ~ I am me the same as when I was lil child filled with love and hope / faith ~ I learned self validation is healthier then group validation ~ losing it all few times truly humbled me ~ having it all or nothing still only sunk in after experiencing both ~ humbled indeed full of empathy vs apathy ~ For I knew what it felt like to be shunned by ones you thought loved you or even cared to that empty stomach and the horrible night it is trying to sleep on no food in stomach hoping to dream about a meal to maybe trick your body that it actually ate. I never gave up ~ I always tried and it seemed to always just barely work out ~ In my self I found me and also seeking questions I always had growing seemed to come to light at right times. I eventually put my faith and all surrendering all to my creator which only made sense to me after finding one self ~ feeling bad for the ones who mocked me for there ways toward me was a reflection of them and not me ~ It was almost like I couldn't find God until I found myself ~ Love was just a word as all were to me with no substance , I learned to Love myself and not until that realization did Love finally sense to me  ~ It finally started making ~ Where did our thoughts come from or even knowing perfect I am not but the understanding that all we do instead of labeling bad or good there was a realization of vibration to frequency ~ This experience I felt this and I like it or the opposite and then empowered me to chose wisely what frequency I wanted to be which was a direct correlation to what vibration I was puting out ~ Also known as point of attraction / karma etc. I will go into more later but I am thankful for every time I had nothing and every time I was pointed in new direction ~ Crypto Currency I actually started getting into and support fully and de centralized un bi est and can not be bribed system is the future in my eyes even when I am still not perfect and make mistakes ~ Even today I lost over a bitcoin trading and could of had a 17,000 dollar day but acted out of impulse/emotion and some what fear which was another lesson for me ~ I bought 127 XBC friday at $ 3.50  ~ It was dropping this morning California time as steem dollar was almost 700 percent up ~ I sold my 127 XBC  at not much profit and put it all into steam dollar ~ wake up call on think before we act for me today when as I bought steem dollar it drops in like a minuet from 7 dollars back to one ~ That hurt a lil but the 127 XBC I sold under 5 dollars watching it go up to a 130 dollars made me laugh for a second ~ I had same feeling as walking home from a casino broke and many hours away from my destination ~ almost 17,000 dollars would of made in 3 days ~ BUT IN THAT MOMENT ~ I smiled ~ Money does not define me ~ I define me ~ Money is a currency that has value we gave it , Just as any currency in the history of currency ~ Value is a strong word ~ I value Love ones and close friends and the experience of life ~ I value knowing that I made it this far so why would I not make it how ever far I am going to go ~ I cherish life and humanity and a fair system not cur opted nor bribed . I hope through crypto currencies like steem , Btc , and all unique coins that serve purpose hopefully helps restore this planet , truth with out bribery and few evil elects that monopolize power through NWO mind set ~ I hope our crypto's helps set this world free ~ Much Love and Respect ~ Matthew Ryan Shaeffer ~ 42dareader0 ~ Desyfers Shaeffer ~ Have a blessed experience everyone in this now and in all nows.