I've been wanting to talk about something that’s been on my mind for a while now, and I'm glad I found this amazing community.
You know those days when you wake up feeling awesome and ready to take on the world, and then there are other days when you just want to hide away from everyone? Well, that's my life, and I’ve come to realize that it's okay.
Let’s start with this whole public speaking thing. I don’t know what it is, but talking in front of a bunch of people scares the living daylights out of me. My hands start shaking, my voice gets all weird, and I just want to disappear. It's been like this since high school. Even though I try to avoid situations where I have to speak in public, life sometimes throws these challenges at me. Recently, I had to give a presentation at our Christian meeting. I was a nervous wreck. I could feel my hands shaking as I held my phone. Did I do well? Honestly, I don’t know. All I know is that I survived it.
Then there are these mood swings. Some days, I’m super chatty, and I can talk about anything and everything. But on other days, I just want to be left alone. Asking me questions when I'm in one of those moods is like poking a bear. I get irritated, not at others, but at myself. It's like being on an emotional rollercoaster.
It's not just public speaking or mood swings; it's also the pressure to constantly be social. Social situations, even casual ones, can sometimes feel like navigating a maze. I worry about saying the wrong thing or not being interesting enough. The fear of judgment often lingers in the back of my mind, making social interactions exhausting rather than enjoyable.
Relationships are tough, too. Whether it’s with friends, a partner, or family, it's hard to keep everyone happy. I want to be there for others, but I also need my space. It's like I'm being pulled in different directions, and finding a stable place feels impossible. It's a real struggle to balance.
And then there’s the never-ending comparison game. It’s hard not to compare myself to others, especially in the age of social media. Seeing people achieve great things, travel to exotic places, or simply appear happy and content can make me question my own life choices. It’s a constant battle between appreciating what I have and feeling inadequate because it doesn’t measure up to someone else’s highlight reel.
Constantly, I doubt myself. I wonder if I'm making the right choices or if I'm on the right path in life. It feels like a storm inside my head, and finding answers is really tiring. This self-doubt isn’t just because of what others think but also because I’m really hard on myself.
But in the midst of these challenges, I'm learning that it's okay to embrace both my strengths and vulnerabilities because, no matter what or how we feel, life goes on.🖊️