They say the first cut is the deepest.
This is the very first song I ever wrote.
In 1998, at the age of 13, I had my very first heartbreak.
This song, although originally meant for one person, shifted throughout the years and molded itself to each lover who left me behind.
I suppose that's the mark of a good love song: if it can move with you through the years, and you can still feel every word.
I remember composing it, I remember playing that little nylon 6 string till my fingers bled and I remember soaking the page of lyrics with tears.
The first cut surely is deep, because we don't have emotional boundaries or coping mechanisms in place. It takes multiple heartbreaks for that to happen but to be honest, the heartbreaks don't get easier or more shallow, and some things: not even time can heal.
The more you have at stake, the more it hurts.
As a result, many of us become hard, bitter and guarded as we get older. Hiding behind old scars, walls and armour.
I refuse to be like that. I'd rather live with my heart open and experience as much love and joy as is possible in this life, even if it leaves me open to pain.
As Alfred, Lord Tennyson famously said:
'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.'
Meant 2 B - Claire Mobey
I wish you
Would look up into the sky
There you'd see
A lonely girl
that's me
I wish you
Would look into my eyes
And there you'd see
A Love that was
Meant 2 B
And I loved you
Like I loved nobody else
You left a hole
So deep inside my soul
When you left
I could Die, Die, I could die
And I know I could not live
Without you here right by my side
But I guess I'll have to learn
I'll have to learn
I wish you
Would change your point of view
And Yes I hope
Then you would realise
That look in my eyes
Means I Love you
Like I've loved nobody else
You left a hole
So Deep inside my soul
When you left
I could die, die, I could die
And I know I could not live,
Without you here right by my side
But I guess I'll have to learn
I'll have to learn
I wish you
Would look into my eyes
There you'd see
A love that was Meant 2.....
Be
Special Thanks to @JasperDick for your incredible support on the guitar and Bill Knight and the Cottage Club Performing Arts venue for sharing and showcasing our music on this very special night.