Happy Weekend!
Welcome back to my new daily routine of reading for one hour. Today, I'm feeling a bit different mentally, so I've decided to continue reading this book.
Actually, I got this book last May and I've read up to Part Two, if I remember correctly. So, let me introduce this book to you. It’s called "Merawat Luka Batin" by Dr. Jiemi Ardian, Sp.Kj.
In the first chapter, it discussed depression in detail, and I just finished the section on the causes of depression. Now, I'm moving on to the next sub-chapter titled "7 Things We Can Change."
But before diving in, welcome back to my morning reading session! It's a new habit I'm building to get back into reading regularly after my healthy morning jogs. Today, I'm continuing my reading at a new café in town.
Self-Esteem
The first part of this section starts with a question about self-esteem: Do you like yourself? There are several interesting points from this question. Self-esteem is translated as how we evaluate ourselves, from viewing, valuing, and liking ourselves, to feeling confident in our own skin.
One interesting thing from this part is how we can create positive self-esteem by first liking ourselves, valuing our strengths, and accepting both our strengths and weaknesses. Practicing self-acceptance with love and kindness without settling for mediocrity is key.
A point that triggered me while reading this part is that low self-esteem often stems from unrealistic self-assessments. We set overly high standards for ourselves, which are difficult to achieve.
For example, a child born to highly critical parents might be scolded for minor mistakes, leading them to strive for perfection and crave approval from their parents and others.
This belief in constant criticism makes them vulnerable to criticism, conflict, and rejection. Every rejection they face wounds them deeply.
This resonates with me today. I realize that a bit of rejection hurts me deeply because of my upbringing. Growing up in an environment full of criticism and constant demands, even when I achieved something, it was compared to others. I often cried silently at night until I forgot and fell asleep. This happened so often that by morning, it was as if nothing had happened.
I realize now that these experiences have affected me as an adult. A slight criticism can deeply wound me, and I find myself craving validation.
This lack of healthy communication skills makes it difficult to complete tasks and maintain healthy relationships. Now, I understand that being able to communicate desires, needs, and complaints healthily can prevent many problems.
From this chapter, I've learned to start accepting myself and to gradually embrace my inner child. I remember how painful it was to cry alone, feeling untrusted, always suspected, and constantly judged. Even now, I struggle to communicate openly with my parents.
So far, that's my reading progress this weekend. I hope it provides some new insights for you too. See you in the next part! If you have any recommendations for books, please leave a comment below.