I have spent the whole day reading "Nearly All The Men in Lagos Are Mad", although I am yet to finish it as a result of minor distractions. Firstly, I am grateful to, @amyrights for sending me the PDF copy of this book, after I stumbled upon her review on her blog. It's been a few days since I received it, and I hadn't gotten around to reading it until today.
I have no idea why the book is receiving bad reviews because the few stories I have read are good and full of lessons. They are mostly experiences that I can bet some women are experiencing in most of their relationships with men.
At some point, the storyline is laughable, and I must confess, however, in between the lines of those funny gimmicks and grammatical expressions are people's tears, heartbreaks, and terrible conditions they had to endure every day.
Nearly All The Men in Lagos Are Mad
The story that became the name of the book did not connect with me on any level. I did like the fact that the lady in question tried to take relationship matters into her hands instead of answering to the world. Although she wasn't successful, I am quite impressed by the way she handled the men who showed up after her frantic search.
The Anointed Wife
This is one particular story that I connected with. I loved her fighting spirit. She reminded me of myself when I am trying to play god, and work out the dynamics and the turnout of events in other people's lives.
She tried to save her husband's face when the story about his affair went public. They were ministers of the gospel and they ought to act the part. Initially, she believed her husband was innocent, and therefore, she was willing to go to the ends of the world to prove it. Until she found the excerpt from the book, her husband's accuser was planning to publish.
The description of the sex scenes as replayed by the book was one she was familiar with. Her husband's bed conversations were as familiar as her name because she still crave his attention on the bed which she barely gets anymore.
One great thing I envied about her marriage was both of their ability to build together right from a tender age. She identified his potentials and hers, and they both work on them to perfection. It was the ability to perfect each of these abilities that brought them thus far.
For her, they had gone too far for everything to come crumbling down as a result of rumors. This means that apart from the fact that she trusted her husband, she also had a family growth to protect.
The moment she found that excerpt from the book, she confessed to having witnessed her husband's cheat on her on two occasions. And she had kept quiet over everything, it saved her marriage.
Ode-Pus Complex
I know what it feels like to have a family business and vow to protect it, in order to pass it to the next generation. This means I didn't blame, Uche's mother, when she tried to protect the business her husband left for her. She wanted her son to take over from her and keep it moving after she was no more. In a bit to play the game of life so it would favor her, she found herself choosing who he gets to marry and who he shouldn't.
Nothing prepared her for the entrance of Jide into Uche's life. It was a match made by the stars, I must say. Mum didn't think of it that way. She looked for value first, before love. And she preached this to Jide, woman to woman. Once Jide understood her reasons, she gave in to her and left Uche for good.
I may not have liked the fact that Uche and Jide wouldn't end up together, but, I caught myself thinking, If one day, I will become like Uche's Mum, trying to scare certain women away from my sons, especially, if there is a huge inheritance that needs to be passed down from one generation to another. I remember my head reminding me that my grandma is like that and that I shouldn't be surprised if I turned out to be too.
Cuck-Up
Gosh, this story reminded me that there is nothing free in this life. And how I am supposed to be wary of gifts as they tend to have hidden obligations.
When Ehi, a soon-to-be-divorced man finds Isi, a woman trying to hold her family together by selling roasted food on the street, a lot changed. First, he showered her with gifts and praised her for her hard-working nature. Winning his way into her life and that of her young daughter, he soon found out, they were struggling financially as a result of having one source of income.
As a businessman, he negotiates his way through life, and it wasn't long before he negotiates with Isi, in the hopes to get an intimate encounter with her. Initially, she was offended by the offer, until her husband convinced her to do it.
What this story made me think about was how, one is required to give, each time he or she wants to take. And how it has worked on all levels of human psychology. A gift blinds the eye, that's what the scripture says. Giving softens the hard spots in human nature, and it has been used strategically by those set of humans who desire more from life than the conventional human does.
This was the reason Ehioze had his way with Jide, I thought. The various innocent gifts she received before his proposal was meant to soften her. Forgive me, if I did decide to learn this social skill, and use it purposefully.
The Gigolo from Isale Eko
This story is one of my best so far, and it's because it reminded me that the first time I saw this phrase, "Seduce or be Seduced", I consciously chose the former, and I have been using it since then. I had thought the latter was for the faint-hearted and lazy folks who would want to gain a lot from their fellow human but are too lazy to work the web around those people and get what they want.
Iggy is a guy who runs the most incredible map with women. As long as he found something he wants in you, he'll go to the ends of the world to get it. It doesn't matter if he has to marry young or change his religion and name. He will do whatever it takes. And he always wins.
He seduces his victim, never waiting around to be Seduced. He takes destiny into his hands. If his actions will bring awesome rewards, he'll take them. For his life, his work, his education, his possession, his business, just about anything.
A Lover’s Vendetta
I hated Dele just as much as Orode hated him. For knowing the truth about his health and child-bearing deficiencies, and choose to bring her along without opening up to her. It's okay because she is trying to take up the pieces of her life. I trust her because she is strong, and she will be fine.
This is the last story I read before doing this review. I know my reviews always have spoilers but bear with me. I am a human who always wanted to share the real-life lessons I gain from my readings with other people. And the Hive Book Club Community gives me the perfect platform to do this, for which I am grateful.
I'll encourage you to read this book, I know, you might feel indifferent about the stories. And it may be because of the various toils you have experienced with your past relationships. However, I admonish you to look past those hurt and learn about human nature, so you wouldn't always take each story personally.
It's a wonderful book. I hope to learn more lessons from the rest of the stories in this book. Happy reading.