Am one of the people who usually do not get excited about a lot of things in my life. Am of the idea that it can go bad at any moment so since it hasn’t happened you need to wait for it to actually happen before you tell people about it. Not that I fear that people will spoil it but it’s just the way I was brought up. Slowly am understanding why I was brought up that way. Do I have any fears? Yes, I am human like all of you and it’s only normal that I do have fears from time to time.
It’s just the way we were created and even at times the one who looks like he or she is the most loving and cheerful one amongst the group might even be the one with the most fear. It’s just that because he or she actually looks happy all the time we usually don’t pay attention.
This should have been a one-sentence answer but since am writing it in a blog I’d have to explain myself in a long post which I feel I might not be able to make in time, but let’s see. So let’s see how it goes.
I have a lot of fears but then I don’t think about that like I think of this one. The worst fear is growing up. Hmm, let me explain.
I’ve always wanted to be an adult don’t get me wrong. But then I’ve never really wanted to grow up since my shs days. Like, I mean these days I could think about the huge responsibilities and all that. I imagine myself failing at being an adult. Sometimes it becomes so scary to me lol. I can’t even sit down and make a to-do list for myself.
On the outside, I might look like am organised but then am not. Am one of the people who like doing things last minute lol. I know there are a lot of people like me but then I just feel like mine is too much at times. I don’t know if this is true but as am writing this blog I feel like all this should be part of the fear of growing up.
I sometimes wish I could go back to being a baby who will be taken care of all my life. I don’t wanna be responsible and all that. Why do I have to forcefully get a job and do a 9-5? What if am not able to make the required money that requires me to be an adult? As you grow you understand a lot of things and these things give you the fear that you’d been avoiding all this while.
So what are your fears? Do you think like I do at times? At times am up, so we have grown just like that. Life didn’t even wait for us to make up our minds to grow. What if I didn’t wanna grow? Let’s see how life treats us after we are all grown up. I wish our worst fears don’t come to pass.
