She falls

She jumped off a five-storey building and her heart leapt not for joy but in fear. She fell and kept falling without a base to make a splat on. She settled in with this norm as she has been here before with an all-so-familiar dealing that seems to have no end. It took so long and in a bid for a change of any sort- she wished there were.

pixels

Have you ever been afraid and yet be in denial all by yourself?

I’m in that dilemma right now.

I think I am afraid of writing a fictional story as though I might choose to copy a movie I've watched (and boy have I watched a truckload of them). Afraid that I might not let my imagination run wild enough or not even have an imagination that is worthy of reading and maybe create stories that could bring out my inmost desires (my dreams to reality or worst - my nightmares to light)

Trust me when I say I make up very good excuses to chicken out of a new thing I've never done before. Funny thing is, this is no new thing.

I wrote a very alluring story in my secondary school that got my teacher so wrapped up in the story that she failed to see the many errors in my long essay writing. It was a timed essay writing that we usually wrote every Saturday during afternoon prep.

Do you want to know a secret, I twisted the story of a friend and made it mine posing as a fictional story. I know it could pass for a made-up story since it's not entirely real but that has in some way messed with my thinking. It makes me feel like I can't create one on my own hence the run and the many excuses.

“What if it turns out towards the negatives?”
“What if it doesn't?” My mind is usually at war and my body doesn't interfere; it just sits back till the war is over or better still to see who wins.

The lies have won for far too long. You could stop this unending fall you know, by cleaning up the mess just in time before our body finds a base.

^{~Whitney Alexander; a lover of God, life and knowledge; a fashion designer, a part time foodie, a resplendent tutor and a blogger/writer/storyteller in the hive family and loving every bit of it. Thanks for stopping by. Your comments and inputs are very much welcomed. xoxo~}