My life is full of experiences and I've always wished and tried to impact everyone and anyone I meet in the journey of life positively. I don't have much finances but I always help in the little way I can because I believe there are some parts of living a worthy life that money cannot fill. Sometimes I act and speak as a motivational speaker but I'm not, I only try to make one see where he or she is wrong and right, correcting it is such an individual's choice.
Image source is mine
Just like the adage that says "You can only force a horse to the river, you can't force it to drink water". I don't advise people, I speak from my little experiences and tell them to follow their heart. I believe once they follow their hearts, they will dance to the tune of their actions themselves, which is way better. Gone are the days you forced a child to do your wish, it is being regarded as child abuse these days unlike when I was growing up when my parents were the principal determinants of my life.
A few years ago at my former residence, before I relocated, I met a young girl whom I was a few years older than. She always addressed me as "big sis" and I cherished her a lot because of her jovial nature. She goes by the name Abimbola, she was in SS1 at that time while I was done with secondary school. Her house is just two blocks away from mine so we do see almost every day. She is a pretty young girl but lacks some qualities that I always admire in growing young girls.
She lacks respect for her parents, which I guess is due to the company she keeps in school. I once discussed with her and she told me "She is a big girl in school and nobody dares mess with her". What she said to me that day made my suspicion right, "Bim-baby" as I always called her, she smiled and hugged me, she is such a lovely girl but her disrespectful nature toward her parents is one thing I dislike.
Her parents sometimes reported her to me and always used me as a role model for her. Although she does say"I wish I could be as gentle and quiet as you are big sis, I love your cool nature", I will just smile and tell her "You can, if you want to be". We'll just laugh over it and forget, but I had another thought the day her mother called me again to report her. "Abimbola is not giving me peace of mind," said her mother. "She can leave the house and come back at night with no explanation of where she had been all through the day, and when I try to ask, she just nags and goes to sleep", she further explained. "Nowadays she doesn't do any house chores, she's just getting worse daily", she concluded.
As she was explaining her bad attitude to me, I felt uneasy in my spirit, I dislike anyone who disrespects his or her parents but here is a girl whom I cherished doing what I dislike most. I comforted her mom that day and promised to talk to her. "Don't worry mummy, I will speak to her and I pray she listens". I couldn't bring myself to promise her that her daughter would change for good because I couldn't force her to change, I could only try.
One Saturday morning, I was off work so I invited her over to my residence. Immediately she arrived, she went straight to the kitchen to prepare noodles for herself and helped me with the dishes and the clothes I was about to wash. This is something she doesn't do at home. I watched her till she was done with it all, and then I told her the reason why I called her over.
"Can you tell me more about yourself, things you will want me to know", I began. She smiled and said "There isn't anything special about me sis", I nodded in disagreement and said, "Everyone created on this planet Earth has one or two things special about them". "Big sis, I'm just like any other girl out there", she said, I moved closer to her, held her hands, and said, "I want to share some food with you today, and I want you to keep it safe with you till old age". She looked a bit disturbed and she said, "It will surely get spoilt, how can I keep such food till old age?".
I laughed out loud, and she looked a bit embarrassed then I apologized for making her feel that way. "It's not the food we eat Bim-baby, it's food for thought," I said, as I rested my back towards the plastic chair I was sitting on. I stared straight into her eyes as she sat down gently listening to me. "I love you as a sister Bim-baby, and I guess you feel the same way about me", I started, she smiled and shouted, "I love you, big sis". I tapped her on her back to caution her from shouting.
"Do you want our relationship to continue?" I asked, she looked surprised or rather shocked. "Big sis did I offend you?" she asked, I smiled and replied, "No you didn't, but you are about to do that". She exclaimed "Ha!!!", I wouldn't do that you know" she further said. If I may ask, "Why are you acting that way towards your parents?" she sighed and bowed her head. "I demand an answer darling" as I raised her head with my hand.
"I don't have any reasons big sis, I just want to live my life," she said, "but you are aware that this isn't the right way to go about living your life right, you are giving your parents a hard time which is not right", I said. " You are exhibiting what your friends are teaching you right?" I asked. She quickly replied, "No sis", "Why then are you behaving the way you are? If you continue this way, I'm afraid I will have to cut ties with you because I wouldn't want people to say I'm the one teaching you to go against your parents", I concluded.
She knelt and promised to change her ways and change her name from Abimbola the troublesome girl to Abimbola the obedient child. Today she has become the best version of herself as we are still very much in contact. Her parents are now seeing the kind of daughter they've always wished for and are happy about her change. Before I left that community, her mom always saw me as their daughter's savior, I guess the food for thoughts I gave her that day paved the way for the giant in her. She is pursuing her career beautifully and well with no regret of deciding to change for the better.
Thanks for your time and your comments will be appreciated.