I have been lucky in life. I have been able to travel widely and held some good jobs. I have a lovely family. Not everyone is so lucky and I have witnessed hardship too.
Nearly 10 years ago, I decided to put my skills into trying to help others achieve and started volunteering as an adult leader in my local youth group.
We do all sorts of things with the young people in our group. Most of them are between 14 and 18 years old but also sometimes a bit older or younger. We arrange different activities and tasks aimed at helping them discover new experiences, teach them life skills and help them be more independent to make the most of the opportunities they have.
I have helped many young people over the last few years but I want to tell the story of one in particular who was a young Asian guy living in London suburbs.
He had been expelled from several schools and his father was incredibly tough on him. His father had removed all TV, phones, computer games from his life and locked him in his room to study. Now, I am not one to judge anyone's parenting because it is tough. Everyone needs to find their own way.
However, this young man was clearly rebelling against the situation. He was always in trouble, often with the police. His father wanted to send him back to India to put some discipline in his life.
As part of the youth group activities, I took him as part of our group camping and hiking on the Dorset coastline at Purbeck which is a lovely area of the southern UK Jurassic coastline.
He couldn't keep up with the group and half way up one of the hills to the cliff edge, he sat down and refused to move. I told the rest of the group to go ahead and radioed through to some other leaders to tell them my plan. I went 50 meters further up the path and sat and waiting for him. Twenty minutes later he got up and started walking.
After a while he complained again and sat down. I did the same again. He realised I wasn't going to give in on his tantrums.
Eventually, he started walking with me. I knew it was hard for him so I took it easy with him and gave him loads of rests but he ended up walking nearly 20 km that day along the hilly coastline to the campsite.
As we talked, he started opening up and talking about his experiences. The main thing was not to judge. I listened and asked lots of open questions to get him talking. With each problem, I asked him what he could do in future to effect a better outcome. We can only change things within our circle of influence. Don't stress the rest.
He did improve after and was just glad to be there for him.