Hello, hivers! It's me again again, momshie Kri! It's been a while since my last blog, and I've missed doing this. I've recently been balancing several duties at work and, as a mother, trying to figure out how to manage everything without feeling guilty.

For this blog, let me share my personal experience on how I juggle and handle my guilt—or, shall I say, every mother’s guilt, especially those common dilemmas of a first-time mommas like me trying to balance passion, career, and motherhood. And the biggest question I have in me is, Am I providing enough for my children, both materially and emotionally?

(my happy momma era begins)

Motherhood is a complicated form of love, unending sacrifices, and endless possibilities. Women have the option between two paths: the career-driven working parent or the dedicated stay-at-home mom. The two careers can be challenging and rewarding, but each comes with obstacles, including the lingering sense of a mother's guilt.

The age-old dispute between working and stay-at-home mothers demonstrates this complex issue. Both approaches have challenges, but both are undoubtedly attainable. However, society regularly passes judgment, compounding the pressure to conform to an expected parenting method.
In today's blog episode, let us discuss the guilt sentiments that I have personally experienced in greater detail. Are you ready?

Guilt Feelings of Career Women and Working Moms

Working women frequently encounter the psychological challenge of balancing their professional goals with parental instincts. The pressures of career advancement can compete with the desire to spend undisturbed time with their children. Every missed school play, unbaked birthday cake, and late-night work call could bring up thoughts of inferiority. The societal expectation to be a superwoman who succeeds at both work and home can be overwhelming.

(me as a working mom)

Working women, on the other hand, provide their families with valuable viewpoints and experiences. They generally function as role models, highlighting the value of personal and professional growth.

My husband and I opted to work since we had no other choice since we were not born with a golden spoon. We have to sacrifice for our baby's needs and wants, from diapers, milk, and the vaccination and other expenses.

(always grateful of you two,my loving parents, my entire support system)

My guilt is that I had to leave my son with my mother, and we can only see each other on weekends, yes only on weekends, like I have to travel from Bogo City to Liloan every Friday night. Imagine my longing and struggle like every night I cried in tears thinking that I should be the one sleeping beside him, the one witnessing all his firsts, the one singing to him and calming him down every time he wants to hear lullabies, hearing his laughter and sharing memorable moments with him. I should be the one at home waiting for him, bonding with him, but he's far away, and we only see each other on weekends. My greatest fear is maybe my son won't recognize me as his mom.

Guilt feelings of stay-at-home Moms

On the other hand, I personally experienced as a stay-at-home mom during my four-month maternity leave period, and those months served as an eye-opener for me, and I started feeling guilty because I had been afraid of missing out on opportunities, such as why should I feel guilty when I devote my entire life to nurturing the growth and development of my own children. They are the primary caregivers, offering unwavering love, support, and guidance.

(family time is always the best!)

As a stay-at-home mom they might wonder how significant they are in their contributions to their families and society. Even if it is actively decided on, sacrificing one's career objectives could become a never-ending problem. However, being alone, boredom, and a lack of external affirmation can have a negative impact on their mental and emotional health.

The constant demands of taking care of our children, chores, and the entire household can be physically and emotionally exhausting and draining. We tend to feel guilty while having little time for personal activities, we don’t even have the time to eat at lunch, take a bath, have a me time in a shower, or even comb our hair 😂. Yet Stay-at-home mothers may feel underappreciated for their efforts because their work is often overlooked and taken for granted.

(bad hair don't care 😅)

The society's expectations and unending demands of constant happiness and contentment in this capacity can be both unrealistic and damaging. As if we don't have the option to slow down and take a rest for a short while because the easily labelled us as lazy moms and "pabayang ina". See? It is critical to recognize the difficulties they go through and appreciate their significant efforts. And not to mention the pressure to be the ideal caregiver, educator, and household manager is exceptional.

I learned and need to learn more about motherhood, which is a great journey full of successes and challenges. The guilt that comes with it is a human feeling that crosses professional choices. By cultivating empathy, understanding, and mutual respect, we can build a society that cherishes mothers in its kindness toward one another.

Whether we work or stay at home as mothers, either choice will help our families and, most importantly, our children. The decision to pursue a career or stay at home is very personal, influenced by a variety of factors including financial need, personal beliefs, and family support.
Mother's continuous guilt is a universal experience that surpasses professional limits, and no one has the right to question our own choices. Mother's guilt is a constant companion, whispering self-doubt and unending insecurity we must have to endure.

How can we overcome this dilemma? We mothers should always exercise self-compassion and set realistic expectations. Also, we should also have a very strong support system, specially from our husbands. Guys, mind you this is really so important; take it from me!

Yes, I know, it is critical to emphasize self-care, whether through exercise, hobbies, or just scheduling time for recreational activities. The most important thing is to provide a loving and affectionate atmosphere for children, regardless of the mother's employment status. Whether a woman works outside the home or concentrates exclusively on childcare, her love and devotion form the foundation of her child's well-being.

Remember, you have all the right to make your own decisions about your life and family. Indeed, motherhood is a rewarding journey, and the most important thing is to be present, loving, and supportive of your child, no matter your path. We’re all doing our best. Every mother tries her best, and that’s enough.💪

That's it for now, stay still with me up till my next journey. chao!

With Love,

Kri 🌹