There are some things that we learn the hardest way. Take it from me. I have been through a lot at such an early age, and one thing that life hit me so hard is the reality that you will always face the consequences of whatever things you do. Everything you've been through is your choice and, most especially, your fault. It will always be a matter of no matter how life pushes you so hard and no matter how life challenges you, it will always go back to how you bounce back harder and stronger and face it. No matter what hindrance life gives you, or no matter what challenges life brings you, it will always sum up to the fact that it will test your patience, your strength, and your well-being as a person. Challenges are there to make you stronger, and, of course, challenges will always be there to test you, but it is a test of how you are as a person. Come with me as I share my motherhood journey, and I will tell you why motherhood humbled me so much in life.
That’s me and my mother @missbebeth during my Christening, Some Time Around 1998
Look at me, young and naive. Clueless of what life is ahead of me.
The Birthday Parties My Parents Hosted For Me
Annually, my parents hosted birthday celebrations for me and they would always invite our other family members and some people closest to our hearts.
Birthday Parties I Celebrated At School
And when I started school at Araneta Learning Center for Child Development in Bogo, Northern Cebu City, Philippines, I always had extensions of my birthday celebrations at school. My parents provided snacks for my classmates and all my teachers.
Flores De Mayo , Some Time Around 2006 or 2007
I always was an angel during Flores De Mayo which was held every May. My parents supported me in my religious life as well.
Kindergarten Graduation At Araneta Learning Center For Child Development Incorporated Bogo City
I graduated at a top-tier institution at Araneta Learning Center For Child Development located in Bogo City, Northern Cebu City, Philippines.
Twirler During Our Drum and Lyre Corps at Araneta Learning Center For Child Development Incorporated
I was active on the DLC as well. I had a perfectly balanced academics and extracurriculars. My parents supported me in all that I want to do.
Snippets From Our Summer Vacation In Germany. Some of my favorite photos with my mother @missbebeth
This is my favorite family trip that we had, Germany. This is our first international trip that we had with my family and it was indeed one for the books. We explored the rich culture, tradition and lifestyle in Germany. This family vacation was the best we ever had.
Growing up, I had a comfortable and convenient life. Despite my parents not being wealthy, they always tried their best to provide me with everything I needed. I had lavish birthday celebrations every year, with all our loved ones in attendance. My parents made sure to prepare snacks for my classmates and teachers during my school celebrations. They were also very supportive of my extracurricular pursuits, and I actively participated in various activities both in and out of school. I was a member of the student organization, joined the Flores de Mayo as an Angel every summer, and sang in the church choir at Bogo City Church. I had a balanced life between studying and my other interests, and my parents always encouraged me to pursue my passions. They sent me to a reputable institution from nursery until I graduated from Grade 6 at Araneta Learning Center for Child Development Bogo Campus. My parents provided me with all my wants and needs. Growing up, I can say I did had a comfortable life.
During my childhood, my parents took me to different places every summer, and I've been fortunate enough to visit several destinations, including Bantayan Island, Malapascua, Bohol, and Manila. However, the trip that stands out the most is the time we spent in Germany during the summer. It was an incredible experience that I'll always treasure. I met countless new people, explored numerous places, and got to see several palaces. The highlight of the trip was experiencing snow for the first time. Overall, it was an unforgettable trip where I got to enjoy all the amazing things Germany has to offer.
During my elementary years, I studied hard and graduated with flying colors. I was consistently at the top of my class, maintaining my status as a diligent and studious student. I always made sure to complete my projects and assignments ahead of their deadlines, as it was my principle to never procrastinate. I had the privilege of having a conducive learning environment at home, with all the necessary gadgets and resources at my disposal. Our house helper took care of all the household chores, leaving me with nothing to worry about except my studies. I am grateful to my parents for prioritizing my education and providing me with the best possible life.
Cebu Roosevelt Memorial Colleges - Junior Senior Prom, 2014
During my high school years, I maintained being at the top of my class while also nurturing my passion for writing. As a member of the school paper, I participated in various contests and even made it to the regional level of the Regional Press Conference held in Naga, Cebu City. However, the most unforgettable moment was during our junior-senior prom in 2014 when my advisor bestowed upon me the privilege of holding the pen of Wisdom and passing it on to my next successor. Out of all the learners in the school who joined the prom, I was chosen to carry this title which gave me immense pride and joy. I express my gratitude to my class advisors, teachers, mentors, and facilitators for appreciating me as a writer. The experience of holding the pen of Wisdom is something that I will always cherish. I passed it on to a deserving student from a grade level lower than me, making it a memorable prom night.
But little did I know when I joined the Junior Senior Promenade this time around in March 2014, I was already one month pregnant with my son, Jacob. This time, I was only 16 years old and was a graduating 4th-year high school student. I got pregnant with my eight-year ex boyfriend. I am certainly not proud of getting pregnant at 16, but of course, I will not be ashamed of it because that's my choice. But during this time, I had no idea I was already pregnant.
After a few months, my mother noticed that I was not consuming our pads at home. My menstrual date and her menstrual date are just days past each other, so of course, she would be able to notice if I use the pads that we have at home or not. And obviously, because I did not have any menstruation anymore I did not used any. At first, I wasn't alarmed because there were months when I will not get my period, and I thought it was normal. I did not think that I was pregnant, but not until one morning, at around 3:00 in the morning, my mom woke me up, and she called me to talk to her. It's fresh in my memory she was sitting on our dining table. She had a serious and agitated look, and then she asked me, "Tell me! Are you pregnant?" I almost fainted to death hearing the question. I uttered, " I don't know." She told me that I needed to visit the doctor that day after we had the conversation to get some tests checked, and indeed, right after that day, I visited one of the most famous doctors in Bogo City to get a check-up and a pregnancy test, and indeed, it became positive.
When I found out I was pregnant, I was already on my first year in college and I was studying Bachelor of Secondary Education Major in English at Cebu Roosevelt Memorial Colleges Bogo City, Northern Cebu, Philippines. I was able to finish one semester, but due to my pregnancy, I had to stop school.
Fast forward, November 29,2014,I gave birth to my amazing son Jacob.
What was it to give birth at seventeen? It was one of the most depressing, disappointing thing I have done in my life. I was not raised given a comfortable life and meant to end this way. I certainly am not built for this. But, in the end, we always face the consequences of all that we do.
During my pregnancy, I was unable to afford the grand maternal photo shoots and monthly milestones that many women have nowadays with their children. Unfortunately, I was unable to get an ultrasound due to financial constraints and my status as a student. Despite my desire to do a maternal photo shoot or celebrate my son's arrival with grand photo shoots which is a trend these days, I simply did not have the resources. However, I made sure to provide excellent care for my son as a full-time mother at home. This meant that I had to give up on my studies, but it was worth it to me to prioritize his well-being.
I then was a full-time mother to my son Jacob. I witnessed all his milestones, I heard the first words he uttered, I saw his first crawl, his first stand, his first run, Was I happy? Perhaps yes, I was able to take good care of my son. Nothing compares to bring a hands-on mother.
I then became a fan of eating at fast food chains because my son loved them. It's a bonding experience for me and my son since he enjoys eating them as much as I do. Whenever we're in the city, we never miss the chance to visit fast food chains. Looking back, I realized we have tons of photos together enjoying our meals there. Here are some of the many photos he has.
I then went back to college and I bring my son with me at school. I joined my classes and my son sat beside me all the time. Going back to college with a son with you all the time was not easy.
This was during my son’s first year at school, Kindergarten. And during this time, I was at my fourth year in college. I had so much to do during my practice teaching. I worked on my lesson plans while taking care of my son’s module all at the same time. It was such a challenge for me but thankfully I overcome it all.
During days I had class, I brought him at all days until I reached my fourth year in college. He was behaved and he always sits still on the designated seat I give him. I am thankful for all my college professors who understood my situation and let me bring my son whenever I had to attend to my classes. I also am grateful for my college friends who helped me take care of Jacob and made sure I was able to survive my college years.
And during the days I had no class, we stayed at home, my son had a lot of activities and a lot of things to do and to play with all thanks to my parents. They provided my son with all he wanted. I have a lot of people around me who are always there to help me raise my son. Being a teenage mother is not easy; you may be bombarded with many judgments from people. Your worth and decisions will be questioned by a lot.
Year 2023 - I am 25 now and my son is turning 9 soon this November 29,2023 and I could only look back on the days where I questioned myself if I could still make it.
But, Did we ever made it?
WE DID!❤︎
Year 2021 - I graduated Bachelor of Secondary Education Major in English and my son graduated from Kindergarten.
Year 2022 - I passed the Licensure Examination for Teachers.
Was it easy? Of course not! I have almost lost my mind and my sanity a couple of times. If only you knew how many depression I have battled and won over. Did it stop me? Never.
I am grateful to my parents for standing by me during my most challenging times, providing both financial and emotional support while I cared for my son. Additionally, my aunt, uncle and cousins in Bogo City were instrumental in caring for Jacob while I pursued my dreams in college. Without their help, I wouldn't have been able to do any of this. I want to express my gratitude to everyone who has been there for me and provided the assistance I needed. Raising a son at seventeen was no easy feat, and I couldn't have done it without the support of strong and caring individuals like my family.
I have a lot of message to relay especially to the youth of today.
❤︎ It is important to remember not to rush into relationships. You don't want to do something you might regret later on. While some people believe that relationships are a crucial part of adolescence, because of what I have been through, now, I totally disagree. Comfort and support can be found in friends and family members. Instead of seeking out a romantic relationship, try talking to your loved ones and building strong relationships with them. It is not wise to enter into a relationship at a young age. Trust me on this, even if you think you know your limits. If you don't listen to your elders, you might end up in situations you don't like.
❤︎ Young women, this is a firm reminder to always stand by your decisions and stay true to your ambitions. Life will throw challenges your way, but they are meant to test your strength and not bring you down. I urge you to excel in your studies and become professionals, so you can achieve your dreams and be independent. Remember, nothing can excite you more than your own accomplishments.
❤︎ Whenever I speak with my younger cousins or friends, I stress the importance of respecting and following your parents' decisions. Even if you don't always agree with them or understand their choices, it's important to remember that they only want what's best for you. As someone who's now a parent myself, I can attest to the fact that you'll eventually understand why your own parents made the decisions they did. It's crucial to always show respect to your elders, as they only have your safety and well-being in mind. No one wants to see you come to harm or danger, and it's important to trust in their guidance.
❤︎ To all my friends and people I know who entered a relationship at an early age, it would be such hypocrisy if you would tell me you haven’t tried doing things you should not be doing especially at an adventurous and aggressive age. I can only tell you to limit what you have been doing and control it as much as you still can.
❤︎ Be an addition to the solution and not the problem. It would be ironic to come from me who made stupid decisions at an early age but take it from me who is now wise enough to learn about what life really is and how it is if you do not think twice of what the results will be once you will do decisions that are rushly made. These days, all things are getting expensive due to inflation and everything so it is not ideal to get pregnant especially at a young age with no financial stability because you will only add up to the poverty of not only your family but to the poverty of the entire country. Be pregnant when you are mentally, emotionally and financially ready. Never rush on things.
If you were to ask me, did I ever have regrets? Yes, a lot. But one thing is for sure, I will never regret bringing this little ray of sunshine into the world. Some things to regret such as I could have finished college first, I shouldn’t have rushed into things, I should have listened to my parents. But what will my regret do to me? It has all been done and I am already facing the consequences of my lame choices. I could only tell you, this journey is not and never for the weak. Your capabilities will be questioned, even your worth and decision-making. Can you blame them? Probably not because if it was me I’d have the same judgment as well. But will it ever hinder me? Never. It made me stronger and made me who I am and what I am today as a person.
I may be far from what I want to achieve in life, but I know I am slowly getting there. I will provide the life I want for my son anytime soon. My dreams were delayed but perhaps I met the deadline. It is never too late to start all over again.
My son is the best thing that I ever made (literally, lol) and I will never regret having him. He is my source of happiness and strength. Whenever I feel like giving up in life, I remind myself that there is this little human looking up to me and calling me mother. He is a blessing not only to me but to everyone. He grew to be a charming, respectful, and hardworking young man. I can’t wait to give him all that he deserves in life.
Motherhood humbled me on so many ways. I appreciated the value of family even more. I learned so many things during the years I spent my days at home as a full-time mother. I appreciated the little joys of home. And most importantly, I learned the value of waiting for my turn.
According to Isiah 60:22, ” When the time is right, I, the Lord will make it happen.” I am a firm believer and a living testimony that things may not always come your way when you want it to be, but when, it is your time. It is your time. I could never imagine being able to graduate college or even pass the Licensure Examination for Teachers after all that I have been through. I thought my life ended there. My ambitions has come to an end. But no. God was only preparing me for something better. I was able to achieve my dreams in life and I came back better and stronger. All thanks to Him and to all the people who never left me during my darkest time.
Trust me when I tell you, it may be a bad day, but never a bad life. And let me remind you, NEVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS! ☺︎