I went to church yesterday and the pastor offered to pray for me, he said the prayer would be for problems to disappear but I refused because I know if that prayer gets answered, my girlfriend is going to die. She is ninety percent of my problem.
I love women, I'm sure most of us do but sometimes, they're a lot to handle. Here I am trying to peacefully write this post and there's a woman behind me pulling my hair because she says it helps her calm down. I'm glad my suffering brings you joy, Vanessa.
Sometimes it's hard to tell if they're a gift of God or the devil because sometimes they seem so sweet and other times, they act like demons waiting for you to make a mistake so they can possess your soul. I guess even the devil portrays himself as an angel of light.
There I was sitting peacefully the other day when my girlfriend told me to she knows the reason her butt is flat told which I innocently asked why, falling into the trap.
Instead of her answering the question, she told me I was confirming that her butt was actually flat. In my honest opinion, I could balance a tray on that thing and it wouldn't fall but never tell a woman her butt is flat even if it could be used to rule a straight line.
Don't get me started on food, theirs is never enough for them. I was hungry the other day and decided to get a burger. I asked her five times if she wanted me to get anything for her too. She said she had just eaten and was very full. I have a little experience in this matter so I still went ahead to get her what I got for myself. If there is one thing I've learned from Hakimi, its always be prepared.
I got back and hadn't even sat down to eat when she said she was hungry and wanted a piece of mine. I told her there was an extra pack on the kitchen counter. That demon walked to the kitchen, came back out, and told me she wanted a piece of mine because it looked sweeter. That should have been the start of my villain origin story.
I opened the door for another girl in a store and she said a harmless "thank you", fueling my girlfriend with ammo. The rest of the day was spent with my girlfriend telling me thank you for all the things I did that day, mimicking the girl's voice from earlier.
How do you kill someone and still have them around? because this girl is driving me nuts.
The hair-pulling has stopped, and now she has asked me if I love spending time with my computer more than her. I wish I could tell her the computer doesn't talk back but that would be me sealing my fate this night.