I was a good boy, and I did everything right. But it didn’t matter, because none of the rules applied to me. I was both. And I couldn’t stand it anymore. I wore the right clothes, had a good job, made sure my hair was always done. I was nice to my mom, polite to my teachers and coaches, and picked up trash when I saw it on the ground. I wore a tie and suit to work every day and I learned to play golf. I made sure my hair was always perfect, even if it meant getting up at 5 a.m. to have time for the blow-dryer.