There are times life throws us a curve. How we go about tackling this curves goes a long way in determining how we live with ourselves and to a greater part others.
To reiterate, life is full of crossroads.
Most of them not easy to maneuver. At every of this junctures, decisions needs to be made. The decision we make has far reaching consequences even beyond the present.
The decisions we give to certain questions of life are often as a result of our personal conviction. What we see and believe is best for us.
However, some other times, we might have to subdue ourselves to make certain sacrifices that might not be too pleasing and totally against what we want for ourselves. This are times we force ourselves to live in self denial.
Most individuals, myself a major culprit, do this out of a sense of selflessness, especially when it concerns family, friends and loved ones. Others on the other hand practice it for their own end game.
It begins to get more complex when one is living on a very stringent budget. In economic terms, every decision is subjected to the concept of 'Opportunity cost.
Take for example when I had to deny and ignore my needs and cravings simply because I needed to save up money for an investment. Or when I had to complete mums project despite having my own important project. They were no way convenient for me but I chose to do them.
Some will say, the end justifies the means, but is it always so ?
When we find ourselves engaging in this efforts and it turns out as planned, it brings a sense of pride and joy that ones efforts were not in vain. But what if things go south?
Like we all know, life can happen at anytime . Things might go awry even when intentions are genuine. Our self denial might instead leave us feeling bad and sad. And there lies the problem.
Life is replete with stories of people's sacrifice and self denials that never ended well, some ending in outright betrayal. One time I experienced this, trust me, I have been miserable ever since. Coming from family makes it the most painful.
I was recovering from an accident that nearly cost me my legs. I couldn't walk for almost a year. Every money I had I had used in treatment. As a result I couldn't renew my rent , I had to go stay with a friend. Those were dark days for me.
While I was down I was still chasing my side hustle. I was into corporate branding. As luck would have it I got a contract from Nestlé. I did the job and delivered. Waiting for payment.
While waiting, one of my brother came to my city for something. To cut the story short, throughout his stay it was obvious he would not assist me in any form, even after pleading with him to. I had used up all I had to execute the contract and I needed every help I could get.
He eventually left for his base. Being my sibling, I never took his actions towards me to heart. We still kept in touch as always.
Fast forward to a month later, my cheque was ready, $3200. Elated, I put a call to my brother and shared the good news. I thought he sounded happy for me. Little did I know.
Few days later he called and started pleading for me to help him so he could solve a pressing problem. He was going to return it in one month.
Knowing him and his awful attitudes I was very skeptical about giving him the money. Me myself had my own very pressing issues. I had to get an apartment and start my life again.
He called and pleaded severally. I spoke to my friend about it. She advised I don't give him the money instead I should give him just part of it. Strangely I felt the need to give him the money he asked for, the whole $3000. I told myself waiting one more month to get an apartment was not too much. How I regretted it.
I gave him, against my own desires and apparent need. And also against my friends advice. Suffice to say, years after, I am still waiting for my money. Safe to say it's gone forever.
I have moved on, don't even discuss it with him again.
It's crazy how we sometimes sacrifice so much for future gains, for our families and it comes back to hunt us. Though some do come out perfectly as expected. Just that the unfortunate ones rings louder.
All pictures from Freepik.com and sourced appropriately.
Quote designed by me.
