Phew!
Didn't realize that I would be talking about this so soon. But here we are.
The year was 2023, just last year. I personally like to call it the most discomforting year of my life. While nice things happened to the people in my life and by extension, me, and nice things happened to me too, I suffered one of the toughest times ever.
UnsplashNever had I experienced anything crazier. Never. You know, when a person complains of something you haven't experienced, it comes off like tall-tales. I can liken it to toothache, as an instance. Before I suffered a toothache, whenever a person complained of it, I said the indifferent, "sorry about it," or "use saltwater to rinse your moth and it would stop." I had never experienced the ache but by general talks, I "knew" it was the remedy. And, if they complained too much, I got irritated and probably dismissed them as seeking attention or over-exaggerating. When once I suffered it, boy-oh-boy!, I knew there were levels to pain. That stuff hearts like hell. I call it the worst pain to ever be experienced by any human.
It was in same vain that I truly understood what a person meant when they said that peace of mind is ultimate. And,I concur.
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So, when I had to resume school in March of last year, the major issue I faced wad that of accommodation. If you've read me long enough, you may be aware that I mentioned sometime back that my family moved houses. If we still were at the old house, that would not have been an issue cause the distance was trekkable or even a hundred naira fee. But the new residence to school was a journey on its own. To and fro cost about #2,000. It would be hectic knowing I would have to leave the house very early and get back quite late.
There was no time to go house hunting either cause I was already behind on the school program. And so I decided I was going to out up with a family friend. A very big mistake that I made. There was nothing wrong with these people but the living conditions were very unfavourable.
These family friends have four kids, with the eldest being about nine years old and the youngest, at the time, was about four months old. A house with young kids is mostly chaotic, I must admit.
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First, I had to rise really early to help prepare kids for school. I was cool with that in the start
The evenings were really annoying. I always returned from school in the evening, when the kids must have been back from their schools, and it was always a mess around the house. The whole place would be disaranged and very noisy. I had my hold on these kids but I couldn't always stop kids from being kids. You always had to yell out instructions or beg them to sit still. From when I was at that place, until I left, their mother took BP drugs every single day. She was constantly shouting and all.
These kids stayed up until really late at night before they slept and it was really nerve wracking for me. I can't function well in a noisy environment and even if I feel sleepy or tired, my body is conditioned to not cave in when the environment is crazy. So, I had to deal with being the last to sleep even if it meant past one am in the morning. And since I don't sleep with lights on, I can only stay awake to turn off the lights. This affected me badly as I barely had good hours of sleep. Even then, I had to awake sometime by 3:30am to study. And it was harddddd. My body was hit hard. My mind was hit hardd. I was always nervy and rattled. My eating cycle and sleep cycle were messed up. I lacked coordination.
At the cloose of classes for the day, going home made me anxious. I still think I was usually the first to step out the door in the direction of my house but it wasn't because I loved to. I love being home but I disliked where I was. Being in a small space with people of varying characters was a lot. Because of how bad my daily cycle was, I could only even manage to eat once a day and even then, it was just snacks.
For personal reasons, I would choose to withhold the most reasons why my time there was tough. It goes beyond this. I have barely scratched the surface.
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Nah! Life was super crazy. I'm easily the kind of person that can withstand whatever situation. The kind that can live with anyone and not make complaints but thar time, I was strained. My heartbeat rate was tripled during my stay there. I was full-faced and a shadow of myself. I recall people who see me asking if I was sick or something. The strain wasn't only physical. Emotionally, mentally, I was stressed. My academics too suffered badly.
Until now, I cannot fully tell of my time there without getting teary.
I had to quadruple my efforts to barely paas my exams. I banked so much on all the doggedness and patience I had built overtime for me not to break down. Thankfully, I had this elderly friend, a lady in her early 40s whose shop I'd go to after school each day to get some calm. I was that uncomfortable. She looked out for me as best as she could. Infact, she was helpful throughout the time.
I didn't just learn what peace of mind is by words but I had a first hand experience with discomfort to learn that. I understood, even better, that home isn't just a house. I learned what could never work for me. I want to say that i learned to endure but what's the nicety in that?
I'm just glad it's all a memory how. Ah! Never again.
I really like how I have managed to play down this post. I do. Because, there's just so much I can only tell.
Thanks for gracing this post.
Greetings!