Those who accompany me know about my trajectory in search of finding me professionally and that my hobby has been jiu-jitsu.
And for those who parachuted here, I'll give you a little summary.
In March, after a moment of anger, I broke my finger and my bedroom door, I was away from work for about two months.
At the end of May I was fired, I had been at this company for 3 years, but the resignation was something I imagined would happen.
Since then I've played a lot of Fortnite, Destiny 2, and League of Legends, watched anime and series, learned a bit of illustrator, studied to be a civil servant (something like a criminal expert), created an Instagram filter for people who train martial arts. And now I went back to studying Illustrator and Photoshop.
In this entire period of discovery, there was one very specific day that gave me inner despair along with brief mental torture.
When I was about to get out of unemployment insurance, I thought about visiting job offer websites, on one of them you needed to register your data and experiences and as I typed and filled in a feeling a very familiar emotion emerged.
The exact feeling of impotence added to the unexpected, the fact of depending on other people bothers me a lot, of having to go through a period of evaluations where people's ego makes us feel small and vulnerable.
A kind of race against time where the competitors are hunger, bills, anxiety and people with inflated egos who want to be better than others.
All of this shows that all the “effort” I've made so far has been almost zero in relation to my desire to be someone in life.
Please don't get me wrong, I don't want to make you sound like a whiner, I want to show you that to be something of value, to be someone notable and admired for the good work you do, you literally have to give your life to it.
You need to set aside some time each day, maybe even skip a meal.
Understand that procrastination and cravings are the biggest saboteurs for anyone who wants to achieve their goals. So if you have time to study something in the comfort of your home, do it nonstop, study like crazy, it will be very worthwhile, even if you are someone's employee at least you will be working on something you like and chose to work.
EVERY GENUINE EFFORT IS HIGHLY VALID and precedes a wonderful delight.