This story will depict gruesome scenes of extreme gore, body horror, and viscera. No, it isn't another one of my science fiction stories, it's a blog about the birth of my son.
Me and Her at 4:41 AM, she's whacked and I'm about to start shitting bricks
It Was A Long Day
My partner and I woke up on Saturday the 8th of April, at around 8:30 or 9 o'clock in the morning. It was like any other day, we went about our day, as usual. Then it got to that evening, and we headed to bed and threw on an episode of Orville - which is a show I had heard about for a good while, but never watched. It's actually really good, I thought it was going to be more of a comedy, but it's not; it has a fair amount of comedy, although, it feels a bit more like Star Trek - we were just about finished the episode at around 12 that night and my partner's waters broke as she was going to the bathroom.
As well as this she had pains in her back. After calling the hospital she was told that it could be a false alarm but was told to come in anyway to check.
We were there at around 1:10 am, and the care journey was pretty surreal - a word that I may use a few times in this post - she was really calm in the car, and I felt like I was losing my sh*t, which was a feeling I kept to myself because I wanted her to remain calm if this was it.
This is actually before the last photo, just around the time she got hooked up to the machines and got her tube of gas.
The Back Pains Were Contractions
She had these pains for a few days, and they didn't seem that out of the ordinary, as she had been having pains and discomfort throughout the pregnancy.
By the time we got close to the hospital she was finding them really tough, shifting in her seat every time a wave came along and we started to time them. They were about 3-4 minutes apart.
When we walked into the hospital, I carried the bags, and she just about carried herself to a private room. Soon the midwife was in, who was really nice and helpful to help us through everything.
The midwife checked her over when my partner got changed, and found that she was 4.5cm dilated. While this was going on, the pain got worse. She was shifting position to ease the discomfort and literally everywhere in the room she spent a few minutes was christened with a patch of bloody/ bodily fluid.
I Wasn't Ready For This
Over time, I prepared myself mentally for having the baby around and looking after him. Thinking of fun things we could do, and how to care for a little human, but, I neglected to think of the actual birth of the child or to prepare my mind for it.
It's not like the movies, tv shows, or whatever. It's messy and pretty damn horrific.
Anytime the pads were soiled I'd clear them away and put out fresh ones for her; mainly because I could stand to look at them. She got the gas stuff to breathe when she was having contractions and I tried to take some for my own nerves but she refused to give me any, stating "I need you to be 100%" - I think I needed something, to be honest, but I'm glad I didn't in a way, because I would have probably passed out. While the contractions were going on I was rubbing her back and trying to talk her through it.
She got an epidural at around 4 AM, and I was sent out of the room to the waiting area for about 30 minutes, and one of the nurses made me a cup of coffee. Which gave me a chance to text family and friends, keeping them informed. It was actually funny, my whole family - who are night owls - were awake and cheering us on, staying up in solidarity and then they started betting on what time he'd arrive.
While in the waiting area, I heard a baby crying, and instantly thought to myself "Did she have the baby?! Did the nurse forget to get me?!" I went for a wander, and it wasn't mine, it was coming from one of the other rooms.
I was called back in, and my partner was really calm now. Not that she was freaking out or anything before, but during the contractions she would be grimacing in pain and unable to concentrate on anything else.
After another check she was about 7cm dilated now, and we were told it could be awhile so to get some sleep if we could. I was in a lazy boy armchair and she was in the bed. I must have gotten about 20-30 minutes and woke to her in agony, it seemed the epidural didn't quite work, and now she was getting contractions pains in her hip - which had been hurting her throughout the whole pregnancy.
The anaesthesiologist, who was a really nice guy, came back in and prepped her for another dose. After that second one, she was completely numb from the waist down. The hours from her passed by pretty quickly, and the midwife came back to check and said that she was fully dilated and was going to start the labour at 8:30.
It was closer to 9 when the first pushes started, and there was a changeover from midwives. It was actually pretty funny, the anaesthesiologist passed by the room in his civi's before going home to check in on her, and the new midwife had no idea who it was resulting in a pretty funny conversation.
Anaesthesiologist: Hi, is (Partner) in there?
Midwife: Yes? (Look of confusion)
Anaesthesiologist: Can I pop in and ask her how she is?
Midwife: Sorry, who are you?
Anaesthesiologist: I'm, blah blah blah.
Midwife: Ohhh, yes, of course, come in.
He was just checking that she was still numb and everything was okay, and after he left we had a bit of a laugh about the slightly awkward encounter.
There was another bit of time before the pushing started where we had a few minutes to rest, or try and catch a nap. I sat back in the chair and closed my eyes for what felt like a second, only to wake up to water crashing against the ground and saw my partner leaning over the bed puking. So, I jumped to attention and all I could ask was "Are you okay?" In between heaves, she managed to say "Yeah."
Apparently, she was calling me before getting sick, but I couldn't hear her. I didn't know what to do, so ran and got the midwife and she was able to help.
About an hour after her violent shaking, she was finally able to hold him for the first time.
The Birth
She had no use of her legs, and the midwife had to hold her stomach to tell when the contractions were coming. Every time one did, each of us took a leg and pushed them back while she pushed, and she was finding it tough because literally couldn't feel anything.
Eventually, some more midwives joined in to help out. This process took about two hours or more, and while he was coming closer, he was OP, which means that he was facing up, instead of down. Which made it harder to pass beneath the 'wall' or whatever. They said that it was going longer than they felt comfortable with, so eventually had to call a doctor in to plunge him out. From my angle, I couldn't see what was happening, just the doctor holding some long tool and going in and then she started cutting.
Within a few minutes, he was on the way. I don't know why but looking at him coming out, covered in blood and mucus, the first thing I thought was "This is a simulation. This isn't real."
It was maybe the sleep deprivation, or the way time was moving, but it just didn't register. I can't explain it. He was instantly put on my partner's stomach, a little red/ pink thing, with a full head of black hair, shivering. All I could do was stare at him, and I didn't even hear the midwife asking if I wanted to cut the umbilical cord. I snapped out of it and took the scissors and cut through this weird fleshy straw; instantly blood spilled out of it, and at that same time, he started crying for the first time in those first few minutes of being born.
Me and the baby, only minutes after he was born.
The Boy
He was taken to a table, and from where I was standing I was able to look past my partner and see him being toweled off. He was lightly crying while being cleaned off and the instant the towel ran over his face he went nuts screaming and all I could see were his hands and feet going, he was literally trying to fight the towel. I couldn't help but laugh at the little fella.
They brought him over to be weighed, and he is 3.12 Kilos, or 6'8 Pounds, a tiny little thing. He's an Easter Baby too, born at 10:35 AM, on 9/4/2023 and we called him Kaleb. But, on his stamp, they wrote the wrong date, they said 9/8/2023, so I guess he's actually four months old.
My partner was full body shaking from the drugs, and the trauma I guess. So I took him and gave him a little bottle, he's really aware and the instant I took him he started to cry, but then I spoke to him and he stopped and just stared into my eyes. I know he can't really see yet, but the way he looks around, it's like he can.
I had to leave the hospital by 10 PM, and by the time I got back to the house I was wrecked, as was my partner. We both spoke in text for a bit, but by this stage, we had been awake for 36 or 37 hours, so each of us was out cold within a few minutes.
Our first family photo, taken at 11:45 AM, about 7 hours after the first photo in this post.
The Next Day
I was back with her the next day, and when we arrived we filled out some registration forms, took some advice from the nurses and midwives, packed our stuff, and left the hospital by about 3 o'clock.
Myself and partner went into Tesco as we got back to the town, and we hung out chatting with her cousins for a bit who were shocked to see her so soon after the birth.
She's all stitched up but is recovering well, and the little lad is adapting to the outside world well, as we are also adapting to being parents.
Little Kaleb; only a few hours old and already giving his first middle finger.
Tests To Come
He had a hearing test and failed one ear which they aren't worried about, as it could be anything from gunk to background noise on the ward, he has 3 attempts at it before they know for sure, one of which will be this Sunday. Today, he has a heel prick test too, but the person is coming to the house to do it.
He's a cute little bundle of joy who essentially only wakes up to eat and get a change and then goes back to sleep, and even when he cries he doesn't annoy me, which is good. He hates nappy changes, clothing changes, and baths. Other than that he's happy and just chills out.
This is pretty much all we've gotten from him, moody looks.
One Bit of Advice To Any Soon To Be Fathers
Don't look... just don't... I didn't want to, but my eyes kept drifting down there, and the blood and gunk were just gross.
Childbirth is beautiful, and the creation of life is magical, but we man folk shouldn't gaze upon creation in progress.
Here's another one where he's giving us the side eye.
That's About It
I don't really have time to go into how he is, which I'll do soon enough in a separate post. I will say though, he's a star.
