@vincentnijman and me, on the ferry about to disembark at Barcelona
Dearest Hive Friends,
It is still dark outside, and all is quiet apart from the distant sound of waves mashing sand, and perhaps an occasional whispering of the wind in the pines nearby the house we’re staying in. These have been the most glorious days of walks, fine food, resting, indulgence, friendships, love and being immersed in a new culture, and now I’m digesting it all from the comfort of a cosy bedroom, before the new day begins.
We’re half way to our new life in Portugal/ wherever we’re heading next, and are living half in a beautiful apartment with brilliant hospitality, and half out of our rucksacks. The car is packed so tightly with all my things that I feel I need for beginning a new life, that we don’t want to start pulling out too much. Better to make do and reuse things, until we get to the other side, and have the house to disembark everything into.
This limbo space is very interesting: after an emotional send-off from Guardia Sanframondi, it was an intense drive both to and from the ferry. Sitting for multiple hours as we crossed the Mediterranean, little fresh air and pretty grim food choices, we then got straight out of the behemoth ship (alongside a great migration of all kinds of vehicles, stampeding down ramps and into not-very-well-signposted highways) and onto an autostrada connecting Barcelona with Palamos… Cripes. Suffice to say we took a break for a cuppa in a roadside bar, rather than nerve-rackingly pushing through to our destination last night.
Still pretty ropey today, what with the strangest feeling of no longer being rooted in my Arthouse, my busy-doing-the-basics days, and the community that I’ve been woven into for a decade and a half… Such a weird feeling of change but nothing new settled. I am looking forward to when we ‘get there’ and I can partially at least claim my old life again, via my possessions and half-finished projects that I can return to.
It is a great creative void, being here outside of the norm, outside of the usual container I would be ensconced within. I like that I do not know where we’ll be tomorrow, nor how the next month will unfold. This is a blessing indeed, in such a busy world. I love how the spaciousness begins to settle into place, and I with it, feel quietly In The World, rather than at the edge of it, in my solid wee existence in that Italian medieval quarter.
Starting anew is a potent dreamspell breaker.
Beginning again, with a proverbial empty canvas, can be the ultimate rebirthing. It can give us this chance to really let go, and to really make new patterns out of the old. IF we go about it consciously. I am trying my best to recognise that this releasing of Guardia and of all that I was uncomfortable with there in Italy, is the perfect opportunity for starting differently, and I know that making life different and better… is simply a matter of concentration.
Focussing on every moment as a gateway, I feel into this new country, new elements, new rhythms that I’m suddenly immersed in.
I am freed from all kinds of attachments here: no maintenance of my big medieval house, no immediate tasks to be attended to, not even much in the way of organising (though we do have to pack up the car for tomorrow’s onward journey) or domestic tasks (our hosts are doing almost everything for us!) This quiet space of not having the usual fiddling and faffing, is quite divine; quite healing and calming to spirit.
The sun is streaming through yellow shutters on the window, and is calling us outside for a bit… Here we go, possibly, to forage for food or to find a nice spot on the nearby beach to sit on.
What will the day bring? I have little attachment to any outcomes, and know that it will all flow forward beautifully, punctuated by power naps, marvellous refreshments, board games and fun chat - maybe some hugs and loving.... All things are richly simple, easy, allowed and encouraged. The world is ours, and we accept it happily.
My love to you all,
www.claregaiasophia.com
