I have always been an advocate for good communication and quality conversations. I do not really like small talk or surface level interactions. I do not believe in leaving things unsaid or keeping quiet just to keep the peace. So, over the years, I have been building up my conversation skills and learning what makes up a good conversation. I have come to understand that conversation is a two-way street. It comes and it goes from both ends. But when it becomes one way, it tends to be a monologue, not a dialogue, not a conversation.
Quality conversation is gotten through listening actively, understanding and then responding adequately. It means not taking words out of context. It means respecting other people's opinions.There are times when we communicate to somebody, but they do not understand. And no matter how many times we repeat these words, they still wouldn't understand maybe because they choose not to or maybe because you are not concise or clear enough. That is not quality conversation. When we are more interested in just speaking and speaking without truly listening, that is not quality conversation.
There's this great friend of mine. When we first met and exchanged contacts, our texts was sparse and surface level as it is wont to be. We would only exchange greetings, ask of our family and our health, send a few stickers and that was the end. I knew this person was someone who had a lot to say. I knew there was more to this person and I wanted to get to know him. But we needed something to spur us on to have a quality conversation. Luckily, I posted something on my WhatsApp status, which he gave a reply to. What I posted was, “Do you actually believe witches exist?”. And when he replied, we spoke in-depth. He led me to believe that there was more to meet the eye than just the superficial things we see in the world. We spoke for more than an hour and it was easily one of the best conversations we had in a while. After that day, each of us would bring up a topic of discussion ranging from politics to religion to schooling and he easily became my go-to person for quality conversations. We would talk and talk and talk. And he was always ready to listen. I think that was what mattered most; that we both practiced active listening and were respectful of each other's opinions. All we had needed was just one spark, one spur to push us on the path of quality conversation.
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Other image is mine