An Unholy Confectionery Abomination

These candies claim to be licorice. Mind, you, I actually like black licorice. Black jelly beans don't count, but I don't hate them. The proper black licorice brand hierarchy probably starts with Twizzlers at the bottom, Red Vines above that, then Good & Plenty, stepping up to Wiley Wallaby, and at the top, Panda. My subjective opinion is what it is.

And then, there is this unholy confectionery abomination.

allsorts.png

This is not licorice. This is bitter, chalky disappointment in bite-size servings. Maybe that's why you scoundrels deliberately distort the spelling. "Liquorice"? Bah!

US spelling conventions are on the packaging here, though. The bag proudly says, "Product of UK | Packaged in USA." Well, if we hadn't started fighting off the Limeys in 1775, this would justify a new rebellion today. Using Comic Sans in my title image is the least I can do to visually express my disgust for now. If I were anywhere near Boston, this would get yeeted into the harbor pronto. Whoever signed up to import this garbage needs to be at least tarred and feathered, and then run out of town on a rail, if not executed for treason.

OK, maybe that's a bit of an overreaction. This wasn't a waste of too much money, and hey, I got a blog post out of it. Beers from across the pond are generally good, so I have to bear that in mind before declaring blanket hatred based on nationality. I guess we'll call it even, but I'm watching you, Britain!


PeakD Signature Bar.png

If you're not on Hive yet, I invite you to join through PeakD. If you use my referral link, I'll even delegate some Hive Power to help you get started.

H2
H3
H4
3 columns
2 columns
1 column
Join the conversation now
Logo
Center