I've had several scenarios where I've had to step in as a leader to calm situations down. And all in all, I think the ratio of me being successful has always been greater than the ratio of me not being successful. To be honest, I really don't know how I do it or how I get the idea of what to do and what not to do. Or what to say and what not to say.
I've always been lucky that whenever I step into such situations, people that I think wouldn't listen or take my advice on a normal day will gradually stay calm, hear what I have to say, and also willingly do my bidding.
ọ tụrụ m n'anya mgbe nile.
When I think about it, I always remember what my father has always been telling me as a kid: "Respect and wisdom earn you the loyalty of a proud man.".
Well, I guess he's right. Papa is always right.
One scenario that got me stepping in as a leader to take care of a situation was the very first wedding ceremony I and my coursemates attended as a class in my school.
Plans were made with our then-class representative (let's call her Sarah). I had rallied around to help Sarah gather the necessary contributions and share the uniform provided by the bride for the wedding with those who paid. Because according to her, it felt like the class listened more when I spoke than when she did. And when all the funds contributed for the wedding had been gathered, I handed them over to Sarah and handed them off.
I was just called to help and not to take over her position as the class representative. Besides, she told me she had it all figured out when I asked if she needed further help.
On the D day, the bus Sarah had hired for the journey arrived, and on first glance, I noticed the bus wasn't strong enough to take us on the journey. Of course, the outside was looking neat and flashy, but from the way I saw the driver handling and touching some parts in the engine before it could start, I knew there was a problem.
It took some magical touches in the engine by the driver before the bus could start. I asked that we ditch the bus and find something better, only to hear from our class representative that she had already made half payment the day before to the driver.
Mind you, the traditional wedding and white wedding were to be held on the same day.
We got to the venue of the white wedding, and when it was time to head to the traditional wedding, which was on the outskirts of town, our hired bus couldn't start. We did all sorts of tricks and even pushed the bus, but nothing happened.
Gradually, the tension began rising, and Sarah didn't know what to do. The bus driver left us to go get a mechanic. Time was passing. By now, Sarah was already shouting with a few other girls in the class who were asking for a refund. As they noticed, she had no idea what to do next.
The attention was focused on me. I didn't blame them; I was the one who convinced them to pay for and buy the required uniform.
My father would always say, "Two captains can't lead a boat, and two mad men can't lead each other."
I began by trying to calm the situation and pleading with the whole class. I assured them that together we can find a solution only if we all stay calm. Luckily, I noticed another bus, a coaster bus, that came for the wedding was half empty. I walked up to the driver to inquire if some of my coursemates could ride with them to and fro, and he agreed, but for a fee.
I got the remaining money from Sarah and picked out those that were already lacking patience, those that had already exchanged words with the class representative, which were mainly ladies, the feeble, and Sarah too, and sent them off on the coaster bus. Assuring them that we would meet them later.
Now those left were 70% guys and 30% ladies. At least, it would be easier for guys and those who are calm to cooperate with me than ladies.
Next, I called them together and told them what we had left and how it wouldn't be possible to get us a 12-seater bus for the number of us remaining that would drive to our destination and back. I let them know that the amount left was enough to hire only a minibus.
I volunteered to hang and pleaded that a few guys join me to hang so as to make room for our ladies inside the bus, who would also try to lap each other. Luckily, four other guys volunteered to hang out, asking me to sit inside the bus with the ladies.
I picked up my phone and called a neighbour who owns a minibus. I explained our present condition to him, and luckily he accepted to drive us, not minding that we were going to hang.
Trust me, the journey wasn't easy, as we had to look out for road safety officials and policemen on the way. Those hanging would get down at the sight of them and walk over to the next side of the road while we picked them up once we crossed over. We did the same thing on our return trip.
Although it was a crazy day, it was one adventure I loved that I experienced as a student. The journey was filled with adventure and fun.