I’d been so busy working on my phone, I didn’t notice her until I heard the sobs and the loud sniffs. I looked up from my phone to see my younger sister crying. Now, Faith is a pretty strong girl who tackles everything head-on and so seeing her cry so bitterly disconcerted me. I beckoned on her and asked her what was wrong.
It took a while for her to get herself together but eventually, she stopped sobbing and started talking. Before, I say what she said, I would like to say that I was pretty excited that she and my other sisters were transferring to a new school. I didn’t like their old high school at all, and neither did they so I was as excited as they were to resume in their new school.
But now, Faith was in tears. And why was this? First off, Faith was constantly at the top of her class in her previous school, but she found out pretty soon that she was way behind with the new school’s curriculum and that saddened her a lot. Then came the fact that she was constantly laughed at by her mates. They laughed at her when she spoke and even when she was silent. They made no efforts to talk to her and when they approached her, it was to laugh at her even more.
She was more than distraught and kept saying, “I miss my former school. Everyone liked me. Everyone listened to what I had to say. What am I doing wrong?”
I was still trying to calm her down as the tears had begun in full force again when I heard the cry of my other sister, Praise. I stifled the urge to say, what’s the matter again? And simply asked what the issue was. And her own story, turns out was similar but quite different.
During the day, she’d gotten a period-stain and was oblivious to it till a classmate alerted her to it. But apparently, everyone else had also seen it so the guys laughed at her nonstop and called her names.
“What about the girls?” I asked. “Didn’t any of them offer to help you?”
But she said they had all ignored her and even one of them whom she’d asked to assist her with her schoolbag so she could cover the stain till she got to the restroom, said, “No, I’m not getting it. Get it yourself.”
My sister was doubly sad by this occurrence because according to her, she thought they'd liked her. And she’d never been treated so terribly in her life.
So, together, I held my crying sisters as they let it all out. When they quietened down again, I began to speak to them.
First off, where Praise was concerned, I told her that it was okay for her to feel bad because you’d think the silly boys would find something better to laugh at than something like that. And to be ignored by girls who faced the same thing she was facing and have none of them come to her aid, but rather blatantly ignore her must be even worse.
However, I told both of them that it was rather surprising that they thought they would have it so easily in their new school. While I couldn’t relate to being a transfer student since I attended one high school from the beginning till the end, I knew what it meant to be ostracized and to be mocked at, for things clearly out of your control. I’d also seen other transfer students that came into the school and even though the students weren’t that mean to the transfer students, they were still sort of ostracized.
What could change that narrative, however, was what they did with their current predicament. Were they going to be the average, transfer students who made an impact and added value to the school or would they remain the unrecognised, constantly antagonized “new students.”
I said this because I remembered a similar situation with a transfer student in my class. No one had paid attention to her and truly, it wasn’t because she was hated, but because nobody saw a reason to associate with her outside the regular politeness. But then the term came to a close and guess who took the first position, with a wide gap in average between her and the person in second place? Exactly, the transfer student.
It was like magic. It was like she transformed in everyone’s eyes. Suddenly, she received compliments on the slightest things. Suddenly, everyone wanted to be her friend. I looked at my sisters as they watched me with wide eyes and hopeful expressions. I reminded them of how important they were and all the potential I saw in them. I also didn’t fail to tell them that it was just an example and they didn’t need to do it just to gain the acceptance of their peers, which wasn’t necessary and frankly not even possible, in my opinion, but because they want to add value to themselves as a person and afford to be proud of themselves.
I added lastly, that there was still another way to make their mates see them. But it was the wrong way, the way that wouldn’t favour them in the long or the short run. They understood and for the first time since the day began, they had a smile on their face. And not just that, a look of fierce determination. I like the feeling I got talking to them and how well they took it.
I guess I don’t have a lot of reasons for saying this other than the fact that I look forward to more words of advice from my dear readers. Maybe things I should add to what I’d told them. Looking forward to all your comments. Have a wonderful weekend.
Jhymi🖤
Image is mine.