Have you ever had a song you really like, but you struggle to listen to it because it makes you want to cry? I realised the other day that there are actually a few songs that make me feel like this now, or at least make me feel sad. I'd like to share the top four of them.
In 4th place is Ghost by Justin Bieber
I'm actually not normally of a fan of Justin Bieber's music, so when I found out that this was his work I was a little surprised. While it doesn't make me cry, just sad, and I can listen to it and even sing along to it, I want to include it because it makes me think of my friend. In April 2023 her husband suddenly passed away in his sleep at the age of 57. It's over three years on and this loss still feels very fresh. She has a passion for photography so thankfully has lots of memories recorded of their time together and when she shares them and shares how she feels like she gets little signs from him I feel like this song describes how that can help someone in their grieving process:
"if I can't be close to you I'll settle for the ghost of you"
"if you can't be next to me your memory is ecstasy"
I'm not sure why it doesn't quite move me to tears, because I cried often enough when I learnt of my friend's loss. Perhaps it's because it speaks to me on how you can try to still keep the positives from the time you had together. It also has a fairly upbeat feel to it, which helps to counter the sadness of the lyrics.
The writers of the song weren't focusing on any particular loss and it's meant to be about loss both through death and moving apart. It's also suggested that it was reflecting on those in the situation where they were restricted from seeing loved ones during Covid lockdowns.
In 3rd place is How do I Say Goodbye by Dean Lewis
I first heard this song in the car and it reached the chorus before it caught my attention with the tune and lyrics. Immediately I knew it was about having to dealing with the loss of a parent:
"How do I say goodbye to someone who's been with me for my whole damn life? You gave me my name and the colour of my eyes"
The tune and the implication of the words brought a lump to my throat. On one occasion I felt the urge to try and sing along to the chorus, but had to stop because it choked me up and I was ready to cry. As time has passed it doesn't make me as emotional as it did, perhaps because both of my parents are still alive, so it's not an experience I've directly lived. I can listen to it and even sing along now.
Dean wrote this song for his father when he was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer and was only given a 25% chance of survival. Happily he went into remission so no goodbyes are needed just yet, but the song has been one of his best performers so far.
In 2nd Place is Everytime by Britney Spears
This is one is a bit less self explanatory. It was released in 2004 and while I remember hearing and liking it back then it's only really come to my attention more recently with Britney's release of her book in 2023. This book has prompted fans to call attention back to it with the revelation in those memoirs that she fell pregnant with boyfriend, at the time, Justin Timberlake's baby and had an abortion because he wasn't wanting to be a father. She describes it as "one of the most agonizing things I have ever experienced in my life." This has prompted many to wonder whether the song was actually written, at least in part, for the baby that she never got to have. While she doesn't seem to have responded to these rumours herself, her co-writer and others have said that it was about her break up with Timberlake and not the baby. However, with the lines which say "My weakness caused you pain and this song's my sorry" and the feeling that it sounds to fans like a lullaby, this rumour isn't going anywhere any time soon.
So officially the song is meant to be about a break up and there are 1000s of songs about heartbreak, so that's hardly going to get me emotional unless I've just experienced it. However, I am a mother and I know people with regrets who felt pushed to have an abortion because their partner didn't want a child. Therefore, everytime I hear the song now my mind can't help but think what it must be like to feel that regret and wonder what that child might be today if things had gone differently. Then I just end up in tears and have to switch it off.
and the 1st place goes to Wish You Were Here by Delta Goodrem
This song came out in October 2012, the year my father-in-law died over in the UK on the other side of the world from us. It had me in tears from the first time I heard it and I still can't listen to it today without crying, so I don't even attempt to any more. The line "I couldn't breathe on the other side of the world" was the one that brought everything back for me the most, because while we were able to visit him a few weeks before his death we could only wait for the call to let us know when he actually passed.
Delta wrote the song as a tribute to a close friend who died in a motorcycle accident at the age of 24. There is no indication of where this accident happened so the above line may be referring to the other side of the world in the spiritual rather than the physical sense, but for us the reference was literally also physical. Interestingly my Mother-in-law died nearly 10 years later and I was closer to her, but the song doesn't make me think of her, just him still. Maybe because I was able to grieve for her in a more positive way and had more positive memories to connect to her. Either that or I'd already connected the song to my father-in-law.
What are your thoughts on this list? Would you change the order for yourself and what songs would you remove or add and why?