It was a busy weekend!
Mrs. Denmarkguy and I were gone most of yesterday and today, once again setting up our vendor space at a local holiday craft show... trying to make a little extra income during the busy season.
I'm glad we went... and I'm relieved it's over!
A couple of old realizations about "who I am" were refreshed.
For one, I find "peopling" to be an exhausting part of life. It's not that I don't like people... it's just that I find the process of being "on" for endless hours wears me down to the knees. And that is not a statement about a lack of practice or social skills, either... it seems like an issue I have always dealt with.
I've been told that I am actually quite good at so-called "schmoozing" but it sure takes its toll! Even when I was in the IT field and "pitching" things all the time it wore me out.
It was never a "nature fit," for me.
The other "realization, revisited" is that fact — which probably applies to most people — that as the rewards for what I am doing go up, the degree to which I feel worn out by the process decreases.
Yes, I'm a pretty "rewards oriented" sort of person. It took me a lot of years to truly recognize that about myself. The realization came out of a long conversation with a friend — who also happened to be a psychologist — at the end of which it was quite clear that I am very unlikely to do anything simply "for the sake of doing it."
I rejected the whole idea for a really long time because it seemed to contradict the part of my self-identity as fairly altruistic and idealistic.
Of course, it's always important to wrap a frame of reference around the conclusions we draw. Along with examining the cognitive blind spots we may have, about certain things.
A bit of light was shed on this many years ago when I got really enthusiastic about me efforts and contributions to a charitable organization... where I ended up having to drop out, admitting that such altruistic work is best done by people who can afford to give lots of time and effort they don't get paid for.
It's definitely nice that what feels like your "true calling" absorbs you for many hours each week... but not so much that your phone and electricity gets shut off because you don't have money for your bills!
This weekend's efforts of selling artwork at a Christmas fair felt somewhat less like an exhausting drag because we sold enough that it felt like a worthwhile endeavor to be there.
It definitely does make a difference!
Perhaps that difference manifests most as being able to come home and sit down and relax for a day... rather than having the nagging awareness that spending two days doing something you really enjoy now means you have to work even harder to catch up to just be where you were before starting.
Little depressing that the wheels seemed to fall off the crypto rally, but I guess you just don't get to have everything!
Thanks for stopping by and have a great week ahead!
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Created at 2023-12-11 18:39PST
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