Feeling Hopeful ✨

It's quite clear that times are hard. One can see it all around us, in our wallets, in our economy, in our relationships, in the news.
Six out of seven conversations is about how hard life is, then probably that one conversation which escapes the trend is about the weather 😂

For me, as of now, I can boldly say that I'm at my lowest.
In my 3rd year of university, moral is low, workload is higher and the only thing I seem to be learning is just how deep my ignorance of a course is😂

Regardless I keep going to that cursed place and keep on swallowing those cursed books.
Monetarily, things are looking dim. A debt coming due on a loan that looked smart at first when I took it but is now looking tight.
Forex learning has left break even and now heading into loss, and hive... Well hive has been good 😂

Yet I'm still writing, I'm still learning and although I don't want to (plus the school is forcing me to) I keep spending😭.

When I saw the #julyinleo prompt for today, I had thought about how I would approach it.
Hope is a fickle term, a belief that numerous people turn to when life seems to be their opponent. To some it's the act of keeping your faith on something due to your own act of weakness and uselessness. To others it's a real thing that one must always have.

For me, well I'm just not sure.
I somewhat agree to both beliefs; it is something that stands as an admittance of weakness and it is something that everyone should have.
It is something I have now as I'm about to open this Heat and Mass Transfer textbook to read.
It is something that I have during my debts and deadlines for projects.

Why do I have it?

The fact that I'm alive is reason enough I suppose.
The option of ending one's life is always there, and sadly it's becoming more popular as the years go by.
Yet when I wake up, I'm still breathing, I'm still kicking, still have enough air in me to laugh, groan and complain.
Well then there's still hope.

Like I said it's a fickle emotion and writing about it has made this a fickle post.
One without any clear purpose or meaning.
I'm just writing as I go along.
When I wrote the previous header 'Why do I have it', I began thinking of Why would people lose it.

I've grown to realize that hope isn't something one should easily lose or throw away.
No matter how bad the situation may seem, I do know that it could get worse...
There are still some people in the world who have it worse.
Well since I haven't lost it I can't really talk about why people may have lost theirs.

I do know why I can't lose it though.
It's a simple thing too.
I would rather die than be known as hopeless.
That's a sorry state. A state without hope, meaning no chance of change or joy.
A depressive state.

I guess I have reached the quota and number of words for a quality post now.
It's been a hectic day and looking at the sheer size of the textbook mentioned above I can predict the night would be just as hectic.
I do hope that this gets curated though. I hope that my writing give you my dear reader hope too and I hope that I don't sleep off on this textbook before reaching page 10😂✨