In the last decade or so I've tried a lot of things to improve how I feel about myself.
I've been to breathwork retreats and ice bath meetups. I've been trained in EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) aka 'Tapping'. And I've done more different versions of tapping than most people I know.
I've done journalling, and Julia Cameron's 'Morning Pages'. I've done affirmations, and Esther Hicks' 'Focus Wheels' by the hundreds.
I've moved and grooved at in-person Escastic Dances and online '5-Rhythm' dance sessions.
But nothing, I repeat, nothing has had as much of a deep, lasting, yet gentle impact on my mental, emotional and physical health as the stuff I've learned from nervous system expert, Irene Lyon.
If you've been reading my posts here on Hive for any length of time you will have likely seen me rave about her work before. And today, I want to do two things:
I want to share with you the three things that I have learned from her that have so far made the biggest difference for me, and also tell you about a free way you can learn about her and her work (alongside a bunch of other awesome health experts at the same time).
But first, here are the cool things I've learned.
To be honest, I could probably write a very long list of things I've learned from Irene in the last 21 months since finding her. But for the sake of not overwhelming you (as overwhelm is counter-productive to learning, aaaaaand it doesn't feel good either :P) let's just boil it down to the three that feel the most important and the most useful:
1. Orient to your environment
There are soooooo many teachers now who talk about the 'mind-body' connection and encourage mindfulness or meditation. And they can be wonderfully helpful practices. I've learned and used multiple versions of both of these over the years. But far out when I started to 'orient' (I'll explain this term in a minute) to my environment as well, then my quality of life started improving immediately. Now I wouldn't be without this practice.
So, orienting means paying attention to something. To 'orient' to your environment means to listen to the sounds you can hear around you.
It means to look at the things in the room or the space around you.
And it means to feel whatever is in your environment that is impacting your body, including whatever you are touching (like your bum on the chair or your feet on the floor) but also how hot or cold the air is around you.
You could also use your sense of taste and/or smell to orient to your environment if these sense are strong for you.
Having a practice of orienting to your environment means two important things start to happen for you. Firstly, you stay safer as you travel through your day because you notice dangers faster and can take appropriate action to take care of your body.
Secondly, you'll feel more relaxed more often because when you pay attention to the sounds of things that are pleasant around you, and you look at lovely things, and you feel the way the environment is supporting you then your nervous system feels safer.
2. Listen to your impulse
This is a lot like trusting your intuition or your instinct. (Funny how they all start with the letter 'I'...)
Now, this is different than just following your compulsion to eat or drink something or go shopping. This isn't following your desire to binge your way through a season of something on Netflix.
This is paying attention to the subtle nuances, the whispers, the hints that your body is giving you about what to do and when.
It might be to turn left at an intersection instead of right for no logical reason you can see.
It might be to call a friend you just thought of "out of the blue".
It might be to leave a party early, even though you were having a good time - you have a sense to leave and you decide to trust that feeling.
Listening to your impulses is something you knew--something we all knew--how to do as a tiny child but somewhere along the way our parents, teachers or preachers, or simply our challenging life experiences caused us to become disconnected from the part of us that just knows stuff.
Learning how to listen to this part of myself again and allowing myself to trust it a little more every day has helped me to feel and move through big emotions that have been stuck inside this precious body for a long, long time. It has been such a relief to let old stuff go.
3. Honour your biological needs
Basically this means listening to your body and doing what it needs.
This means eating when you're hungry (instead of pushing through). This means drinking when you're thirsty (which requires you to pay enough attention to your body to notice in the first place!).
This means going to the toilet when you need to instead of telling your bladder or colon that it just has to wait until you finish that email or whatever. And... it also means burping and farting when you need to (kinda gross, I know, but important. I'll explain why in a moment).
Finally, it also means moving your body and resting your body when your body indicates it needs these things.
So, why? Why are all these things helpful for supporting your mental and emotional health?
Actually, it's quite simple:
When we don't give our body what it is telling us it needs (a bed to sleep, a toilet to relieve ourselves, food to fuel us, etc) then it sends a signal to our nervous system that says, "We can't do that thing you need. Sorry. It's too dangerous right now. You'll have to wait."
Now, that might seem extreme - "too dangerous" - because in so many societies we have normalised the pushing through, the making ourselves wait, etc.
Many of us had to wait to eat, wee, move when we were at school. Many of us were reprimanded for burping or fidgeting or needing to eat between meals. And many of us still find ourselves in jobs where it is perhaps impossible to do what our body needs when it sends a signal to us.
So, we've shut down our connection to our bodies. We're so used to making ourselves wait or hold things in that it just feels normal.
But that doesn't mean the body feels any safer just because it's a common societal behaviour.
Here's what happens when you start to honour these biological needs more often and sooner:
Your body starts to feel safer.
And when it feels safer it allows you to feel more of your feelings again. It means you feel less numb and more connected to your emotions. It means that that sadness that's been stuck in there for years and years that doctors have maybe labelled as depression can finally start to move. It means that you can start to find and feel the joy again that you felt as a young child.
So these are the three biggest lessons I've learned from nervous system expert, Irene Lyon in the last couple of years.
If you want to learn more on this topic, Irene is one of the speakers at The Health Transformation Summit that's coming up in just a couple of weeks from now. It's a free event with a paid upgrade option (that gives you more goodies). If you want to learn more about her work which has literally changed my life, then this will be a beautiful intro into who she is and what she teaches.
Some of my posts include affiliate links that help cover the huge amount of time I spend learning new and useful things and then re-teaching these life-changing concepts. If you choose to buy something through one of my links I may get a small commission at no extra cost to you. Thank you so much for your support. I really appreciate it.