Family relationships are not always easy. There are divorces, stepparents,
siblings and sibling rivalries. Step-brothers and sisters, half-brothers and sisters,
in-laws. Aunts and uncles and cousins and grandparents. Deaths. Births. All of
these and all of the possible combinations.
Family dynamics are complex, and then you throw in the personalities of all the
human beings involved and what do you have? A mess, pretty much.
Some of us manage to wade through the mess pretty well. We may have lucked
out in the original birth lottery and managed to come out with parents that were
pretty stable, easy going and managed to somehow get us on the right track to
adulthood relatively unscathed. And hopefully, we will manage to get our own
kids off to a pretty similar start in their lives as well.
Unfortunately, not all of us are quite so lucky. Somehow we got dumped in the
other end of the pool, and have spent a lot of years wading through some
seriously foul muck. Narcissistic mothers that left us with massively bruised
egos and self-esteem so low we can walk under a snake’s belly while wearing a
top hat or dad’s with substance issues, that were only present in our lives long
enough to make us glad when they were not.
Yet, somehow, we managed to survive, and actually succeed in creating good
lives for ourselves. We grew up to be good, strong adults, carving out lives for
ourselves that we can be proud of. And we did this IN SPITE of our families, not
because of them.
And then the holidays roll around, and we feel the guilt start to sink in again, as
we contemplate not going home. Or worse yet, we feel the insecurities rear their
ugly fangs as we do head home, knowing what we will face when we get there.
All those years of therapy go out the window, and in minutes, your ego is jello
and your self-confidence on a scale of 1 to 10 is about a -12. Mom has you
apologizing for being a ‘strong presence’ or Dad is berating you for the new car.
Stop. Take a deep breath and remember that you are NOT alone. There are a lot
of us out here that have been through this, and you will get through this. You are
strong. You are an entrepreneur with special skills and talents that got you where
you are today.
You are not that child anymore. You are not simply the sum total of your parents;
you are the person that YOU want to be, living the life that YOU want to live.
And you belong to the most amazing community on this planet - the world of
internet marketers and entrepreneurs.
You are not alone.
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