When I was very young growing up the first time I ever heard of clones or copies of other people was from my mom. She told me there were doubles of my dad! One had freckles, one had a scar on his lip, some were skinny or more heavy weight, they had different complexions and even different ages! Mom told me that all these clones of my dad were in a biker gang!! A whole biker gang of clone dads!!
My mom was delusional from schizophrenia! Yet maybe she is onto something. There are different sides to every person it seems! When someone is in a different mood they can seem almost like a totally different person. Some people who experienced severe trauma have multiple personalities. That is almost like copies or other versions of you in one person. Many conspiracy theories and science fiction speak about clones and the apocalyptic fear behind it getting out of control. I think this is where my mom got her delusions from, part fiction, part reality.
I had an experience of thinking someone was someone else on the internet. A Doppelgänger! It happened in a strange time in my life. Sometimes people mistake me for someone else. I too have some Doppelgängers! Also what I think about is split personality. Almost like the dark side and the light side of a person. I am not sure if I have experienced true split personality. I always feel like a whole self. I know to fight to keep my self intact though!
I do get into some freaked out moods sometimes. I pretend to be the person people treat me as. Sometimes in a pissed of and/or exaggerated way! I try on the hat, even if it doesn't fit! That is far as I go with split personality. I notice times where people treat me like this 'other person' like they don't know the real me! Usually in a party setting. That's when I notice peoples personalities switch and even turn ugly! They change they way they talk and act to fit in. To get along with other people. I don't like that. I like to get people one on one and get to really know them. I never flip my character or persona to try to fit in.
Whenever I try to act like and believe other peoples put downs it never works. Depressed people in anti social social circles always try to make themselves and others out to be less than. Less than they really are so they can hide. It's an old trick hazing ritual then doesn't work on me!! If I were to put myself down and call myself names and doubt myself I know that is not the real me! No matter how bad it gets I can't blame myself!
I'm not responsible for a group dynamic. Therefore the loser me, the no good me, the give up me, the hate everything me, the hate myself me etc. isn't the real me! I can tell! That's why I get so freaked out and pissed off if I every try to blame myself or beat myself up - 'cause I know it's not true. It would be a travesty to lie to myself and blame myself for something that isn't my fault, yet there are many who point the finger and want you to blame yourself so they can scapegoat you so they don't have to change.
